Create-A-Servant 2

[34]

My next sheet would be an even sillier Servant from South-East Asia, about a certain man who was cursed by his mother.

[sherlock1110]

I need to get on top of these Servants

William I the Bastard: It looks like an interesting sheet but... it's a bit strange to use a historical portrait as a faceclaim. Considering how different the Nasuverses incarnation of their characters are to their real-world counterparts (look at Vlad... or Astolfo) it usually provides the opportunity to make your character animu. Moving onwards from the most petty objection possible the initial bit of the sheet is suitable for the character, his talents being taxes and war makes him sound like a perfectly charming individual already. The personality section is not too long, but not too short either and it's all useful information on the character.

As his alignment is evil it looks like his Noble Phantasms are going to be foreshadowed throughout the Sheet, so with the Parameters which seem appropriate it looks like he'll have a skill or Noble Phantasm that can cause a big shift, whatever it is it's going to have to justify EX Rank Mana well, although the NP is ranked B.... Independent Action at B rank but it can become EX. Independent Action is explained well but Magic Resistance could be fluffed more, I don't know if C is necessarily the base rank of an Archer class Servant. I've already got a feeling about what Doomsday Book does, so I'm looking forward to reading something that can make Independent Action begin to reach Independent Manifestation levels.

The Personal Skills are also sensible, I do however still harbour some criticisms of them. Mental Pollution has been partially explained, but you haven't gone into detail about how powerful it is exactly (like you did with Independent Action and Magic Resistance), also it has an unexplained positive modifier. Military Tactics has a similar problem although it's not too big of a deal, you've explained the positive modifier but not said what his base level of Military Tactics might do, when he leads an army for example, how might this make them more effective in combat? Riding also seems a bit rushed, one tip with Riding is always adding in the line about Phantasmal Beasts, as it makes you seem more competent when writing the Sheet.... that wasn't the best advice sorry.

Both Noble Phantasms look like they have been expanded on quite well, I shouldn't be complaining as there is always more room to fluff about a Noble Phantasm. Hastings comes across as the less important of the two which is likely what you were intending, with it being limited by how long a battle had last. Perhaps it could be more effective against kings or other leaders? Or maybe that suggestion is just kind of unnecessary, most likely the latter. So... the Doomsday Book makes him fat? I was trying to work that out from obtuse. An interesting Noble Phantasm, representing a type of taxation I've even thought about Noble Phantasms of this type before (when thinking about Mehmed II in the Archer class) and this is interesting and well-written. Firstly when an area is claimed as the "Kingdom of England" does it gain the trait of being part of the Kingdom of England, so would William gain a rank-up due to his fame there? And secondly, I don't believe that having ridiculous amounts of Mana would mean you can fight without a Master, it seems to be linked to some other quality, so I don't know if gaining infinite Mana would necessitate Independent Action and instead of "essentially" granting him it they would probably have to be separate concepts. Nice sheet on the whole though

Meleager: I knew about this guys legend but completely forgot his name, starting with parameters they might be a bit too high, B+ for Strength seems a bit over what I'd imagine (probably just B at most), as a character who I can't remember having any feats of Agility it should've been C, Mana makes sense though I wouldn't imagine him having such a high Endurance (Endurance typically seems to be how little damage you take when hit, whereas Battle Continuation is more to do with being badly wounded and persevering) and Luck is certainly inappropriate for a character who was destined with such a horrible fate from birth.

Weight: 200 pounds of PURE MUSCLE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. The skills seem a bit underdeveloped, while Magic Resistance is appropriately ranked Riding is, as has been previously pointed out, not sensibly ranked. I'm having difficulty with Instinct as well but that's unimportant. The Log of Fate is in essence Battle Continuation at EX Rank? There's a lot of room for this to be developed as it's currently left as just a log, does he just show up with the log when summoned? In which case how can he not just hide it in empty moorland somewhere if it looks like an ordinary log. The Sword of Meleager seems a bit vague, as well as not exact to the legend, it could've been more like a Skill that increases his parameters when fighting a foe, but burns the Log of Fate. My suggestions on this sheet aren't the best, sorry to not be of any particular use with my critique.

Matilda of Tuscany: Nice looking Face-Claim on what seems to be a very interesting sheet. Those are surprisingly average parameters, I'm used to always having at least one parameter to pick up on but this seems like a more or less well-rounded character in terms of parameters. The Class Skills are appropriate but considering her ties to religion I don't know if I'd raise Magic Resistance to C, it could do with more description fitting her character but Independent Action has been written very well so props for that .

On the whole the Personal Skills are flavourful and well-written. Virago exceeded my expectations while reading it, not only did you go into great detail on what it exactly represents but you gave a general description of the level of it as well as a more exact description of her manner of Virago (if that makes sense, I don't exactly know how to convey what I am saying here sorry -_-). Protection of the Faith is alike very well done, there isn't really much I can comment on here (I guess I've gotten better at critiquing than complementing...) But I like your description of the Investiture Controversy, it's painting her character well for me and I'm excited to see what these Noble Phantasms will be like. Golden Rule was also well done... I'm not being the most constructive here so I'll just move onto the Noble Phantasms.

Frecce Lethe is a simple but inventive Noble Phantasm, you've shown how it's linked to her character and how it could be used in a Grail War effectively. I could only ask if there were any specific visual effects accompanying the Noble Phantasm. Sorry that this is shorter than the usual review, there just isn't much I could say is needing change. Now for the final Noble Phantasm, Road to Canossa, where do I start. Can I really say anything about it at all? I think not. So I guess I'll just fall back on the cringey line of this thread (although I think I'd have a good reason for asking this time) how do you think she'd react to my (far-inferior) Anselm?

Kamehameha: I like how you've given him an alternate class directly dependent on what catalyst is used . Damn though, why are these sheets getting so well written? I complained as much as I could about venom's Meleager but it still was quite good... this is making my role difficult. You've done a really good job on his character and personality, although is it just a regular short sword? I'm guessing he'd have a special type that was from his region but it's a minor nitpick.

Though he united the islands of Hawaii I don't know if B in Riding is particularly appropriate, C in Magic Resistance is due to being on an island which was separated from the rest of the world (like how Britain works). So all-in-all the Class Skills are okay, you've also done a good job in personalising each skill there. Personal Skills are also pretty good, Affections of the Four Deities allowing for Mana-on-Demand is pretty cool as well. I don't know if Military Tactics at Rank B is necessarily warranted by his combination of different fighting styles in his army, maybe C rank?

I'll be honest, the Noble Phantasm is probably the most boring part of the sheet. It's summon-a-boat and I know that's a bit of a joke by now but there isn't anything particularly original about it, especially when compared with the rest of the sheet which was quite well done. It's not that it's a badly done Noble Phantasm but that it's somewhat inappropriate, something to do with his unification of Hawaii or another part of his legend, hell maybe even befriending Isaac Davies would have made for an interesting ability. I won't even give extra points for the Dragon Ball joke since the Noble Phantasms are usually meant to be the high point of a Servant Sheet, sorry.

I agree with you that some skills feel to specific to characters nowadays though, Thrice-Setting Sun should be a Noble Phantasm (even a weak one) rather than a Skill. It's probably to do with how FGO and Fate Extra have warped Servants to fit gameplay mechanics.

Said Idrus: Huh, I was having difficulty finding stuff on this guy. Sorry if my critique isn't too good then. Is Chaotic Neutral appropriate? If he's a religious figure he'd generally be more based about following strict rules... My understanding on the matter is probably too little, sorry. Class Skills are fairly interesting, Territory Creation in particular, although as others have pointed out he does seem to be too focused on this one legend.

Onto the Personal Skills, Miracle.. well yes that is certainly appropriate. Although if his legend is the enactment of a single Miracle then I don't know if he should have B Rank, or Miracle at all as you'd think it'd be limited to just the volcano. It's not stated if it is just limited to the usage of the Noble Phantasm or if the skill has another usage, sorry. Protection of the Faith at C Rank is to be expected, you've also described just how different he is well.

ITS THE BIG NOBLE PHANTASM TIME! Yeah... I can see why he'd get sniped by Emiya the instant he was summoned. If I was into Geography, Geology or a similar subject I'd be able to comment on how exact you've been with the eruption, but I can only really wonder if there would be some more conceptual effects, considering how he called down the eruption from God would it have some particular impact on those who did not ascribe to his religion? You've done a good job in building up to it and, while he is interesting, he isn't practical in a Grail War. Still that doesn't make it a bad sheet and on the whole it is clear you put effort into this. Reviewing the (unfinished) personality I like the catalyst, it foreshadows who the Servant is quite well.

Zeno of Elea: FINALLY A SERVANT I RECOGNISE! Which mean I have to be all the more critical in order to seem unbiased. One mystery I've been trying to unravel is where everyone gets their face-claims... I'm not the best at doing it (one time I wrote a sheet for the only comments to be about how the face-claim was not properly credited) so I was hoping to steal the expertise of others. Aaaand he has an EX Ranked NP.... I'm on edge already.

With the Class Skills I'd understand Item Construction being short (due to it being sealed) but you could've written more about Territory Creation, he could go all Escher and make a big paradoxical landscape. But then again you've done a good job with describing the Personal Skills. Paradox Creation is an awesome skill by the way, one of the sheets I'm thinking of writing is also all about warping reality so I'm taking notes . Really stupid point but I don't think he could raise his Agility using the Tortoise Paradox, it seems to me that would be more along the lines of "cannot be overtaken", so he could just casually walk away from combat and they couldn't catch up to him.

With regards to the EX RANK NOBLE PHANTASM (Zeno Elish) it's the "motion is impossible" Paradox, I was looking forward to this. I have so many questions about the exact mechanics of this but I should limit it to the questions that might actually help the sheet. Firstly I'm assuming that with his Mana rank Zeno can use this Noble Phantasm most of the time and without invoking it's true name? Also would his paradoxes from Paradox Creation be capable of messing around even further with the Noble Phantasm so, maybe, by twisting the concept of an object (there has to be a paradox about that somewhere) he can use it as an effective tool for countering multiple projectiles. Otherwise it's a very thematic Noble Phantasm that fits the character well, even if it is so open from a mechanical standpoint that I want to pick it to pieces for all kinds of different situations (I can just imagine him shit-talking an enemy Servant who just used their Noble Phantasm while expanding the space between their sword-beam and himself).

Wait, you credited me in the afterword? Is that because the sheet was based around an obscure figure (It's one of my Noble Phantasms) because otherwise you clearly failed to replicate the masterpiece that was Zhuang Zhou/Sacher-Masoch/Beveridge by not making Zeno a Rider class Servant.


Sorry that I took so long to get around to that, it's probably quite a bit shorter than most of my other critiques and not useful, but hopefully I've gotten at least a few good points in there .

[venomking]

That's a good sheet, the phantasm makes since for him as does the skills, thou just out curiosity can he use his now to propel his own physical attacks?

[Omida]

Thanks for the analysis!

When I put faceclaims, I usually mix it, sometimes doing historical portraits and sometimes anime ones, which probably is inconsistent of me and I should stick with one or the other, but hey, that part isn't that important and is usually included just so we don't have to put three to five lines describing appearance, right?

Regarding Riding not getting any mention of magical beast and/or phantasmal creatures, I figured that I will put what they can ride, because what they can't ride is largely irrelevant (unless you are planning making a gag out of it, I guess).

I will flesh out Military Tactics and Mental Pollution with additional sentence or two, so it is fluffier.

On the Doomsday Book. Yes it makes him fat. About Independent Action turning into (in your own words) Independent Manifestation, I always saw it as mana supply problem. See, Holy Grail is supposed to supply lion's share of mana (see what happens when Ilya or Rin try to support Servant without Grail around) and as long as Master is contracted to anchor them, they are plugging the leak of mana, so to speak. I base it on Fate route, where Saber's problem is twofold: 1)Shirou is not supplying her with mana, so she has only what amount she had when she was summoned and 2) that amount is not enough to power up her all the way to full capacity, so she suffers a downgrade. Now, thanks to Medea we know that Servant without Master can survive a couple of hours before expiring, even if they don't use any mana (which suggests Master acts as some sort of plug for metaphorical mana leak). I guess it's because World catches up to Servant not being supposed to be there, since they are not even familiars anymore, and starts pressuring them more, so they need to actually expend mana to maintain their form.

So, what Doomsday Book does is supply William with 'all the mana', enough in fact that he can fight at full capacity and not worry that if his master gets killed he poofs out. Which means, in hypothetical scenario where William survives the Holy Grail War but doesn't get the Grail and has Doomsday running, he can do whatever he wants, because he is constantly supplied with mana, so he doesn't need to worry about some of it constantly leaking.

I though briefly about Doomsday creating extension of "Kingdom of England", but decided against it, it's just how William calls territory affected by it, because the book is historically tied to England and not, for example, Normandy, which he also ruled.

[venomking]

Also I addressed luck in my sheet, his luck comes from being semi blessed by the fates and I addressed how he died and how it affects his luck, like I said in that skill his luck will fail him, by that I mean it becomes E- when fighting alongside female Greek heroes. His phantasm isn't really battle continuation, the log keeps him from ever being killed, but does protect from damage only death, for example if a servant a throws a knife at him and a killing blow, the knife will turn out to be dull cuase ing it to get lodged in his skin instead of his heart, or a servant about to activate a phantasm will find themselfs changing there minds, or a servant might find like a long lost enemy or something or there master gets in trouble force ing them to flee, and wounds are never brought to point of being able to kill him, that how long of fate, also log of fate kinda of glows so he can't hide it in marsh, plus he would probably consider it un honorable to hide and would keep it on him in some safe place that can't be easily targeted in battle, or he'd have it with his master, but only if that master has a good bind with him.

[RoydGolden]

By the way Sherlock, how do you think your Zhang Zhou would get along with my Zeno Servant?

[sherlock1110]

By the way Sherlock, how do you think your Zhang Zhou would get along with my Zeno Servant?

Did I even give Zhuang Zhou a personality? I consider him one of my worst sheets so...
Eh, re-reading what I wrote up (thankfully it was less painful than I thought it would be). Well obviously he'd call Zeno a weak scrub and that he needed to become a Saver class Servant Considering I designed him around the concept of being a sceptic he'd probably ignore Zeno for the most part, that was kind of what I was going for with his character. Although he might come around to Zeno's emphasis on unraveling preconceptions (as exemplified by Socrates), although this would really be shown at the best by chuckling when Zeno either mentions a Paradox, or uses one through his Paradox Creation... I was planning to take some elements from Zhuang Zhou to make an altogether different (and hopefully far better) Servant so this was coincidentally around the time I was thinking of him again.

So, what Doomsday Book does is supply William with 'all the mana', enough in fact that he can fight at full capacity and not worry that if his master gets killed he poofs out. Which means, in hypothetical scenario where William survives the Holy Grail War but doesn't get the Grail and has Doomsday running, he can do whatever he wants, because he is constantly supplied with mana, so he doesn't need to worry about some of it constantly leaking.

I was under the impression that Masters not only provided Mana but some kind of link to the world, it's vague but I don't think a Servant with hypothetically unlimited amounts of Mana would be capable of using a skill that was essentially Independent Manifestation unless they had the expertise to do so. Perhaps I'm being too vague on this front but I do believe that aspect of the Doomsday Book is contradictory to the system of the Nasuverse.

[Express]

Chief Sage of the Forest...One Born From Trees...Merlin’s Knockoff
Source: http://kariya077.tumblr.com/image/146757854001
Class: Caster
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
True Name: Gwydion
Origin: Folklore, Wales

Parameters
Strength: D
Endurance: D
Agility: D
Mana: A+
Luck: C
NP: EX

Class Skills
Territory Creation: (EX) (C)
Territory Creation is a Caster-class Skill. It is the Skill to build a special terrain that is advantageous to oneself as a magus, such as for the purpose of collecting mana.
Truly a misnomer in the sense of this Skill’s definition, Caster doesn’t actively create a specialized territory as much as he finds a spot that’s suitable to his tastes before collecting mana as if he had actually put in an ounce of effort.
This strange phenomenon owes its power to the “territory” Caster possessed in life, his personal castle Caer Wydion. What’s special about Caer Wydion is that it’s everywhere; in fact it encompasses the entire planet and beyond, because Caer Wydion was used synonymously as the ancient Welsh term for the Milky Way. A magnitude of scope that’s impossible to be boiled down to a Noble Phantasm, Caster is instead able to enjoy the mana-regeneration and defensive perks of a C level in Territory Creation at any time, anywhere.

Item Construction: (A-)
Item Construction is a Caster-class Skill. It is the Skill to manufacture magical items, from implements of war to items for daily use. Also, this Skill requires time to gather components and manufacture items.
Caster is able to produce varying items that contain magical power, although the best results are achieved with only the most basic, natural ingredients. Before you call him picky, he’ll be happy to volunteer the fact that he once built a female homunculus completely out of flowers and a little willpower.

Personal Skills:
Divinity: (B)
Divinity is the measure of whether one has Divine Spirit aptitude or not. At high levels one is treated as a mixed race of a Divine Spirit, and the level declines when the Heroic Spirit's own rank as a Monster or Demonic Beast raises. It can also decrease due to one's dislike for the gods. Those who have A Rank Divinity or above has reached the throne of a god. It also has an effect which reduces special defensive values called 'purge defense' in proportion to the Divinity's Rank. It can break through Skills such as Protection of the Faith and Enlightenment of the Sacred Fig.
A “Child of Light” perhaps in a different context, Caster is the son of the Welsh mother goddess Don, and grandson to the primordial Welsh deity Mathonwy. An agent of fertility, Don’s blood is where Caster gets his skill for the manipulation of life. Although his father is unknown, and he’s sometimes worshiped as a god himself, Caster points to his very much human uncle to rebut why his Divine Spirit aptitude isn’t higher. Mostly, it’s probably because he just doesn’t care.

Shapeshift: (C)
Shapeshift is a Skill that refers to both borrowing bodies and appearance change.
Caster is able to change his shape into that of a deer, boar, or wolf. A strange and small selection to say the least, because of an old trauma Caster is unlikely to answer questions about this Skill, much less use it.
He will, however, turn himself into a woman for fun, of that there is no doubt.

Illusionism: (A)
Illusionism is a Skill that denotes excellence in the art of illusion within the field of magecraft; a magecraft for the use of beguilement. Refers to interference with the psyche, and the projection of illusions into reality.
Caster was responsible for casting numerous large scale illusions throughout his life, although most weren’t for what one would call selfless reasons. He was able to turn a small amount of mushrooms into twelve hunting dogs, twelve gold-studded shields, and twelve magnificent stallions with saddles and bridles of gold, all just to steal some pigs. Later when he was assisting his nephew, he caused a forest to appear as a rampaging army and ships to materialize from nothing in the harbor. However, all of his illusions only last a maximum of 24 hours.
At a Rank of A, the introduction of nightmares unto the realm of the psyche is a matter of course; and even within reality, an illusion on the scale of a single village may be manifested with ease, to the end of successfully beguiling humans. At this level, it is even possible to go beyond people and deceive the environment.

Natural Insight: (B)
Natural Insight is the ability to grasp the essence of things. Perceptive eyes for observation that will not overlook any information.
A quick understanding of all things that lay before his eyes is a matter of course. When his nephew was “born” as nothing more than afterbirth the size of a marble, Caster had an immediate understanding of the boy’s potential future, and saved him from certain death. Later, when taking on the forces of Arawn, the raised dead were unbeatable unless a certain warrior of Arawn had his true name deduced. Observing the designs on the warrior’s shield, Caster correctly deduced that it was Bran the Blessed.
He’s been known to use it as a sort of pseudo-Eye of the Mind, at least that’s what he credits for his victory over the hero Pryderi in single combat.

Noble Phantasm
Cad Goddeu
Army of the Forest Sage
(Anti-Army, A)
When Caster’s brother stole divine deer from Arawn, Arawn retaliated by invading Caster’s homeland. In an effort to end the battle quickly and minimize human casualties, Caster performed his magics that lead directly to the infamous Battle of the Trees. By infusing every tree that could be found in Wales with certain corresponding Ogham runes, Caster raised a veritable army against Arawn.
A Noble Phantasm that can be said to only belong to a Chief Druid, it is similar to the communal Noble Phantasm of the other lesser Forest Sages, but on a much grander scale. While a certain Celtic hero without his spear is able to raise a single giant composed of hundreds of powerful, condensed tree branches, Cad Goddeu is capable of raising hundreds, if not thousands.
More so than sheer numbers, the “soldiers” of Cad Goddeu are described in the poem of the same name as having manifold different abilities, corresponding to each species of tree. Therefore, Caster is able to stock and people his army while considering the situation, much like an RTS.

Wisdom of the Ash Grove
Grand Enchantment of Britain
(???, EX)
The second of the Three Great Enchantments of the Isle of Britain, taught to Caster by his uncle, Math ap Mathonwy. It is the true nature of the ash tree, perhaps the most sacred to the Druids for its task of holding Heaven and Earth at a comfortable distance. Though possessing mystic qualities already, this particular enchantment is far and away on another level.
Because of a secret oath he made with his uncle, Caster won’t divulge the true power of this Noble Phantasm unless begged or forced to. However, he hints that it was responsible for raising his nephew Lleu Llaw Gyffes from the dead after he was slain by Gronw Pebr, in which case it would obviously inhabit the realm of True Magic.

History

Gywdion fab Don is to Wales what Merlin is to Britain, or what Loki is to Norse tradition. A being inhuman in property who delights in the the company of that particular species, usually causing more trouble for everyone involved than not. A son of Don, the oceanic mother goddess, Gwydion appears primarily in the latter half of the Mabinogion, a collection of the four great texts of Wales. He helped his brother rape his uncle’s lap-virgin (it sounds weirder than it is) by causing the tiff with Pryderi, then turns around and offers up his own sister as a replacement for Math’s lap pillow. When she fails the virgin test, she runs away ashamed while Gwydion steals away the forgotten Lleu, to raise himself later. Also there was another kid who turned into a seal or something.
When Lleu had grown up enough, Gwydion took him back to his mother and tricked her out of the curses she laid on Lleu, apparently just for existing. Some sources say it was Gydion who directly fathered Lleu with his sister Arionrhod, so there’s that too. One of the curses Arianrhod levied against Lleu was that he shall never possess a wife unless she gives him one, so Gwydion teamed up with Uncle Math and made the boy a waifu out of flowers. But that didn’t go so well.

He might seem overpowered but he’s Merlin’s archetype so it’s probably okay.
Pryderi or Blodeuwedd might be next.

[RoydGolden]

I was under the impression that Masters not only provided Mana but some kind of link to the world, it's vague but I don't think a Servant with hypothetically unlimited amounts of Mana would be capable of using a skill that was essentially Independent Manifestation unless they had the expertise to do so. Perhaps I'm being too vague on this front but I do believe that aspect of the Doomsday Book is contradictory to the system of the Nasuverse.

Gil's A+ Independent Action was said to make the existence of a Master unnecessary, so there's definitely precedent for that sort of thing.

Independent Manifestation is another matter entirely though, since it also grants protection from insta-death and timefucking attacks.

[sherlock1110]

Gil's A+ Independent Action was said to make the existence of a Master unnecessary, so there's definitely precedent for that sort of thing.

Independent Manifestation is another matter entirely though, since it also grants protection from insta-death and timefucking attacks.

I understand that there were further nuances to Independent Manifestation, but what I'm saying is there isn't a link between "having a ton of Mana" and "Independent Action".

[Omida]

I was under the impression that Masters not only provided Mana but some kind of link to the world, it's vague but I don't think a Servant with hypothetically unlimited amounts of Mana would be capable of using a skill that was essentially Independent Manifestation unless they had the expertise to do so. Perhaps I'm being too vague on this front but I do believe that aspect of the Doomsday Book is contradictory to the system of the Nasuverse.

The problem with Masterless Servant is that without contract, their mana is constantly leaking out out of them, and since Master is supposed to supply them (and apparently the very existence of contract prevents leak), they need to resort to searching for a new one before time runs out.

And since it was mostly meant as hyperbole, no sweat.



Anyway, okay, so before we begin, this is alternative take on Saber Lily I made for a project of mine. I am mostly posting it to get opinions and because I wanted to play around with Blossoming Journey skill that Grand Order gave her.

Faceclaim

Class: Saber
True Name: Arturia Pendragon, Fair King of Knights
Alignment: Lawful Good
Place of Origin: Britain

Height: 1.54m
Weight: 42kg
Likes: chivalry, flowers, knightly romances
Dislikes: dishonour, inequality, Anglo-Saxons
Talent: equestrianism
Natural Enemy: Vortigern, Pellinore of Listenoise, Merlin
Attribute: Earth
Traits: King, Dragon, Summoning Influenced by Sorcery Trait
Armament: Caliburn
Catalyst: piece of Round Table, Caliburn's shards

Personality

A bit on the shy side, Saber loves horses and horseback riding just as much as stories of gallant knights wandering the world, righting wrongs, rescuing fair maidens and getting entangled in courtly love. She developed interest in flowers, if only because it seems one of the only topics Merlin tends to take somewhat seriously and thus it seemed to be a way to gain a respite from his tricks and pranks, while getting to know him just a bit more, but since then she gained genuine appreciation for their beauty.

Saber is aware of her shortcomings as a knight (and her situation as being summoned from wrong period of life) but is cheerfully optimistic about future, since it means she will get to relive her life a new, and maybe take different course. Of course, she can be somewhat lazy about her supposed knightly training, preferring to just laze around on horseback, or reading a book or perhaps enjoying some flowers...

She seems to hold heroes with great stories of honourable conduct and loyalty in high regard, hoping to one day be just like them.

STR: C(B)
END: C(B)
AGI: B(A)
MGI: A
LCK: A+
NP: B


Class Skills:

Magic Resistance: B(A)
Protection against magical effects that cancels all spells below three verses and makes one difficult to target even by High Thaumaturgy and Greater Rituals. Saber's lessons with Merlin yearned considerable results, making her immune to all but the most powerful thaumaturgy.

Riding: B
Expertise to ride animals and vehicles. Most of them can be handled with above average skill, but Servant cannot ride the likes of Phantasmal Races. Saber has a certain talent with horse that stems as much from training and travelling around as it does from spending much of her youth helping out in stables.

Personal Skills:

Blossoming Journey: EX
Saber is an aberration in the Grail's system, having been summoned not from the peak of her legend, but from time when she barely begun gathering fame and recognition. This skill represents infinite possibilities that lay in her future, as she develops as a hero and was created by interference from her Master's Sorcery Trait. It automatically activates upon summoning, lowering her physical parameters, Magic Resistance and Instinct by one rank. In exchange, over the period of seven days, her experiences will gather spiritual charge. On the seventh day, parameters, Magic Resistance and Instinct will be raised back, and Luck check will be performed to determine assignment of additional Noble Phantasm, even one that would normally be unavailable to Saber class, and this skill will be exchanged randomly for another one from those that Saber could posses.

Instinct: B(A)
The ability to instantly identify “the best personal course of action” during combat. Saber's sharpened sixth sense is closer to reaching the realm of predicting the future. Through this ability, it is possible to halve the penalties inflicted by visual and auditory interference.

Mana Burst: A
Increase in performance caused by infusing one's weapons and body with magical energy and instantly expelling it. At this level, a normal weapon that is not on the level of a divine mystery can be destroyed in one blow. Raises defence in several times. Saber uses this Skill mainly for defence and high-speed movement. Executing large-scale body reinforcement through Mana Burst is only possible with Saber's immense magical power. While she herself possesses average physical strength, she managed to defeat countless enemies by strengthening all of her actions with her excessive magical energy.

Noble Phantasm:

Golden Sword of Victorious

Caliburn

Type: Anti-Unit
Rank: B
The legendary Sword in the Stone, the Sword of Selection that Arturia pulled of and thus was marked as King of England. A beautiful blade meant for the perfect king, constantly emitting soft, silvery glow of authority. While not created as a weapon of war, since a king is expected to defend their subjects it can serve the role, if not at the same level as its more famous counterpart, Excalibur.

Upon declaring it's true name, Caliburn converts Arturia's mana into heat, and releases it as crescent shaped wave of holy fire, burning especially strong against those who wield curses, unrighteous ( those of non-Good alignment) and those who violate rules of chivalry. Although Arturia must be careful with Caliburn, as her immense magical power can overtax the blade, causing Caliburn to break under the strain. Another curious trait of the blade is that if Arturia were to break the rules of chivalry, Caliburn would 'break'. It will become cold, lifeless lump of steel, no longer great holy sword, but merely a warrior's blade, for even it is not cruel enough to leave her defenceless in middle of the battle.

Summoned as Lily, Caliburn interacts with Saber's Blossoming Journey skill in somewhat interesting ways. Should the sword break in any way, upon seventh day of skill's charge, it will be replaced with Excalibur and Arturia will be given Avalon, while Blossoming Journey will be replaced with Charisma, thus completing Saber's journey from idealistic young king into her most famous, if somewhat jaded form of King of Knights.

[RoydGolden]

Gywdion: So, I've seriously considered writing up a sheet for this guy in the past but now I probably won't bother, because your take already accomplished everything I had in mind and more. I like how you interwove bits of his personality into his Skill descriptions, and the Skills themselves are quite fleshed out as well (the justification for his EX-ranked Territory Creation is particularly interesting). Personally, I would've given him True Name Discernment (obviously at a rank lower then Jeanne or Amakusa) to represent the whole "identifying the warrior's identity from his shield" incident but Holmes' Skill works too.

Also, from the FC I was expecting a Demi-Servant Kariya for a few moments there.

[Express]

He really only did the name guessing one time, and it was directly due to just noticing what was on his shield. I did consider it though, but it didn't feel right.

[venomking]

I'm thinking about doing a ruler class Gilgamesh focusing on the idea of him being the first king, I already have a phantasm in mind, but can't think of any skills.

[RoydGolden]

I'm thinking about doing a ruler class Gilgamesh focusing on the idea of him being the first king, I already have a phantasm in mind, but can't think of any skills.

"Being the first king" is literally Gil's entire character-concept. You're going to have to be a more specific about what makes your take unique.

[venomking]

In more, rather then his phanatsms and the like focusing on his being the first hero and a treasure hunter, my idea was his phanatsms focus on his being the first king of Babylon, less of a focus on his being the first hero, and more his being the first king.

- - - Updated - - -

Basicly his phantasm was going to put some focus on the laws he created.

[RoydGolden]

Basicly his phantasm was going to put some focus on the laws he created.

Are they any records of the laws Gilgamesh established? Because that could be an interesting idea...

[zikari8]

Are they any records of the laws Gilgamesh established? Because that could be an interesting idea...

H-he built walls.

[venomking]

He had a couple established laws, I bealave the laws were called the code of Hammurabi.

[RoydGolden]

He had a couple established laws, I bealave the laws were called the code of Hammurabi.

Um, I don't know how to say this, but... you do know the Code of Hammurabi was invented by Hammurabi, right?

Personally I'd say going with the concept you've outlined, it'd make more sense just to write up a Ruler- Hammurabi sheet rather then another version of Gil (of which there are enough already).