Okay i see my second was also not very good,but have i improved my Layout actually?
and sorry if i have unintentionaly remindet someone here on something unpleasant!
Okay i see my second was also not very good,but have i improved my Layout actually?
and sorry if i have unintentionaly remindet someone here on something unpleasant!
As a matter of fact, I was considering giving him a chariot from Kaguya-hime and a pestle from the moon rabbits, but I wanted to give him something original. I guess I'll go with that.
Update: Never mind, I just found a version of his legend where he has a sword.
Last edited by King of Padoru; February 27th, 2018 at 05:42 PM.
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Well this was my take on Tsukiyomi... and it was Kaguya, but I am not sure if it really works.
Oh, that's an interesting things of viewing things. If I had to do a version of Kaguya, I wouldn't have considered making her be Tsukuyomi, but something more a la Arcueid. I may consider doing something similar.
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Gentle King: Wow, his NP and backstory really remind me of Shu from Guilty Crown (complete with a name-dropping of the Void Genome from that show). Other then that though, this is a quite good sheet. You clearly put a thought into what his various Skills and abilities mean thematically, which helps the sheet feel like a coherent whole rather then a bunch of vaguely related elements. His personality is simple, but well fleshed out.
...I can't help but wonder what would happen if Shirou summoned this guy. That is, if the universe doesn't explode from sheer concentration of quasi-suicidal altruism...
Thanks to everyone who has helped me with this profile, although in the end I've taken a different path. This is my Tsukuyomi:
Rider
Identity: Tsukuyomi no Mikoto
Gender: Male
Height: 170 cm
Weight: 58 kg
Alignment: True Neutral
Origin: Japan
Weapon: Sword
Parameters
Background
Personality
Skills
Noble Phantasm
As you can see, he's a situational Servant that will become stronger or weaker depending on the date. I thought it'd be a good idea to make him like this to nerf him while not making him lose his identity. His second NP is meh, but I wanted to give him something to use without having to look at the calendar.
Last edited by King of Padoru; May 15th, 2018 at 07:09 PM.
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Here is my third Profile and moshi gozaimazen for my two last failures after i heard your oppinions !
But i dont give up!
Grendel
(Berserker)
Background
Appearances:He is as Giant a Man of collosal Build and surmounted even Herakless and DariusIII with his 3.45 meters,his rust colored Skin is more scale as human-Skin ,he has slit-like amber eyes ,he wears atleast as Berserker only (similar like Herakless) a loincloth.He carries a sickleclaw-shaped mace as Weapon.
Personality:He has a latent hatred on the Humanity for destroying his Homeland and slaughter his friends and Clan,although he isnt as blind in his Raging Hatred to not differ under the People to not recognice good hearted Humans as he had as child friends under them.Despite his highranked Mad Enhancement is his Mind only dazed and dulled but a conversation is fundamentaly possible and he is able to act reasonable.
Abbilities:
He has thanks to his Born Demon,Monstrous Strenght and Mad Enhancement Strenght A++,Endurance A++,Agility B.Mana:A,Luck:C
He has due to his size a almost terrifying amount physical power.despite his size he is quite nimble .His personall skill is Born Demon RankA ist provide a Parameter bust,magic resistence at Rank C with a A+ Rank curse immunity,batle continuation rank B,and D Rank presence concealment as Berserker.
He has as Berserker only one reall useable Hougu :
Cruth-atharrachadh dhiadhaidh dorcha(Dark Ancestral Transformation)
He has also Qualifications as Saber and Assasin
Looks like tonight is the night for making future heroes and OC’s into Servants. Not my cup of tea in the slightest but hey, you do you.
As for Tsukuyomi, I think the parameter choices are a bit odd. Either have them set and multiply like Gawain’s or go fully into to E~A fluctuation like Hideyoshi. Also as a full blown god, a skill like Godly Divine Core would be more appropriate than regular ol’ Divinity.
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With Grendel, I get that English isn’t your native language but the formatting is a bit all over the place which makes it even harder to read.
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Today in the morning the first though that crossed my mind was "how would be if Shu Ouma was a servant?" First I tried to create a "normal" servant, but didn't had any idea good enough... So thought about a pseudo-servant. I made several modifications to be more "nasu inserted", but anyone who watched the anime would recognize( with the soundtrack, FC and such)
So... He IS Shu Ouma
And if he was summoned by shirou... The universe certainly would explode.
Last edited by Criarino; March 1st, 2018 at 10:50 PM.
Sorry Bird of Hermes would you have some suggestions and advises to make it better for me?(litle additionally Question what is a OC again?)
OC, Original Character.
I’ll keep it short. My advice first and foremost is slow down. This is the third sheet you’ve in 2 days that I can recall. Take your time and make sure the basics are done (grammar and a neat structure) then that way when you focus on making a singular quality sheet you can put your best ideas into it.
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Seems like it would have been easier to go to the modern fiction thread and just make Shu a servant outright.
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One good advice is to read the other sheets here too, so to have a better idea about a sheet's organization.
And don't worry, I'm not a native English speaker too (in truth I'm Brazilian). With time you will adapt and learn many things.
"Simply make it a servant" and where would be the fun?
And, I was thinking... We really need a different thread only for modern fiction servants? Wouldn't be better just add this category to the index? This servant I did wasn't TOTALLY a Shu, so I didn't know if I posted him here or there, that thread already confused me like this before too. In this thread we have a better feedback, too.
We already have one on this board.
I have a bit of a question and challenge for anyone who is curious. A friend gifted me his copy of For Honor a few months back and there was a character within it that recently made me curious about something. The question/challenge is at the end of this post.
For those that haven't played For Honor, here is a trailer that was officially made introducing Apollyon and giving slight insight into what she seeks out as an "Age of Wolves:"
For those unaware here is a bit more about what exactly it is that Apollyon strives for as well as why she fights for it. Apollyon is the warlord of the Blackstone Legion which is one of the two dominant subfactions among the knights with the other subfaction being the Iron Legion though the latter was temporarily absorbed into the Blackstone Legion as part of the campaign. Apollyon seeks to use her forces as well as the two other major armies of the setting to restart a war that had lasted for centuries and hopefully spark an eternal war without peace.
Before she was a warlord bent on restarting a world war, Apollyon was once a young girl whose village was raided by vikings after the man who supposedly had the strength and responsibility to defend the village abandoned his post as he deemed the village unworthy of protection. This young girl swore vengeance on this traitor and when she was sixteen she got her chance when she ambushed and then brutally executed the traitor as well as having his armor reforged for her own use. At some point Apollyon was part of the Iron Legion but she was part of a group that decided to form their own legion with Apollyon killing eight of her comrades for the title of warlord of this newly formed Blackstone Legion.
Apollyon views the state of the world as one in which the weak rule over the strong when it should be the other way around and that peace only breeds weakness with war being the only time in which the strong can thrive and people can be as bloodthirsty and warlike as they actually without having to hide it. This "Age of Wolves" is an age in which the weak are rooted out and either die or become wolves like everyone else which translate into social darwinism and an attempt to create a world where everyone is fit to survive unlike the people of her village.
Apollyon seeks out to create a state of constant warfare to remove the power the weak have over the strong, let humanity reveal its true face in her eyes, and to ensure everyone is fit to survive by creating a world in which the weak/sheep are unable to survive against the strong/wolves. "War, I am War."
What servants or historical figures do you think would agree with Apollyon's philosophy and would also strive for an "Age of Wolves" if given a chance. I am curious as to if anyone has any ideas for someone who would also seek out an "Age of Wolves" as a wish from the holy grail or even attempt to start one before whatever holy grail war they are part of comes to an end. If you were to make a servant sheet based off the concept of a servant striving for this idea, who from history or mythology would you do? Could you think up and make a sheet based off of a seeker of such a dangerous idea?
I know this would probably be better as a prompt for the Monthly-Make-A-Servant thread but I don't see myself winning that contest anytime soon so I figured I would just share this here and see if anyone is up to taking on a little friendly challenge. I won't feel bad if nobody gives this post a second thought but I am curious as to if someone could think up of someone that would pursue this goal (besides maybe the horseman of the apocalypse associated with war.) All in all I hope you guys have a good rest of your day.
Can't think of any Servants who fit it off the top of my head, but that philosophy strikes me as pretty similar to Twice's goals from Fate/Extra. (Or, for a non-Fate example, Big Boss's Outer Heaven from MSG)
Last edited by RoydGolden; February 27th, 2018 at 11:18 PM.
Someone from the Volsung Saga.
I nominate Signý or Gudrún.
Last edited by Historia; February 28th, 2018 at 01:25 AM.
Signý does sound pretty ideal for that actually.
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This reminds me of the time when i got confused over if i could post my willy wonka sheet here. Like, the sheet had so many original ideas that it was certanly not just a formating of character onto a certain container, it was really more like the sheets on this threed then the sheets on that one.
I get why people dont want to see a "goku" that tries to be as OP as possible to win against gil. But maybe the rules can be a little more malleable
here is a list of my servant sheets(new and improved format for my servant sheets)
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