Create-a-Servant

[Crying]

Ruler's qualifications are supposed to be something of a neutral, moderating stance that had no desire for the Holy Grail. They have Magic Resistance, True Name Discernment, and God's Resolution.
Avenger's used to be "be Angra Mainyu." Now it's ???VENGEANCE I GUESS??? They have Avenger, Oblivion Revision, and Mana Replenishment.

I don't think Mana Replenishment is a Class Skill, just a Personal Skill that all of them have for some reason... I blame GO being dumb.

Also, I'm pretty sure the Avenger qualification is "being edgy".

I'm looking for ideas for a non-Asian, non-Irish and non-Greek Lancer or two.

Also, what are the qualifications and proper class skills for a Ruler and Avenger?

What areas/countries, exactly, do you qualify as Asian? Where does it stop being Asia and start being somewhere else?

Anyway, here's a couple of people who could be Lancers; Shaka Zula, Saint Longinus (though he's been done plenty of times before), Nzinga Mbande, Zenobia (though if you think that Syria is part of Asia then she's ineligible) and/or Tomyris, who may have used a spear.

[Mcjon01]

Three for three, kind of looking like a class skill.

[Arashi_Leonhart]

Until we get some Avenger that doesn't have one of the skills and since poor poor Angra of all people has it, it seems like a class skill to me.

[NightEye]

So, I'm guessing there's no real established template for Avengers outside of Fate/GO then?

What areas/countries, exactly, do you qualify as Asian? Where does it stop being Asia and start being somewhere else?

Anyway, here's a couple of people who could be Lancers; Shaka Zula, Saint Longinus (though he's been done plenty of times before), Nzinga Mbande, Zenobia (though if you think that Syria is part of Asia then she's ineligible) and/or Tomyris, who may have used a spear.

These look like a good place to start. Thanks man.

[Arashi_Leonhart]

The established template of Avengers outside of FGO is "be Angra Mainyu."

[NightEye]

Thought as much, thanks

[Mcjon01]

The established template of Avengers outside of FGO is "be Angra Mainyu."

FGO just stole the idea from Strange Fake tho to punk Narita before he could get volume 3 out

[Arashi_Leonhart]

FGO just stole the idea from Strange Fake tho to punk Narita before he could get volume 3 out

Nasu's prerogative. If I was the creator of a shared world and someone else that came in to write for it came up with something I really liked, I too would try to do something to hijack that idea and claim it for my own. Brilliant writers are really just the best thieves.

[Constructman]

Honestly seems underpowered. I'd give him more NPs; he's basically a Rider in Ruler's clothing, and Riders are known for having multiple.

Also, Magic Resistance should be a class skill.

As the herald for the end of times to bring forth a new Age of Gods, I was expecting an EX ranked Anti-Evil / Anti-Humanity Noble Phantasm akin to Ea. Although he is certainly powerful, honestly he should be Gilgamesh tier in my opinion. Hell, you could even put Gil as a Natural enemy as they're basically polar opposites.

Working on that now. The problem is that unlike other Hindu heroes, his weapons aren't given a description. He doesn't have anything like the Brahmaatra, Pashupatastra, Vasavi Shakti, or anything. All I know is that he has a sword, he has a magic horse, and he ride throughout the world eradicating evil. I'll try to think of something original though.

Also mvoed Magic Resistance; thanks.

I think that's only for regular Prana Burst, not the (Flames) version.

Is PB Flames just setting yourself on fire? No jet burst effect?

[Arashi_Leonhart]

PB Flames so far has only "imbue weapon with prana effect" part in description, presumably because imbuing yourself with fire might set you on fire.

Although tbh I thought it might be a more effective jet burst if it were like making you a literal rocket.

[Constructman]

Added two more Noble Phantasms. One is a sword that can bypass defense if the target is evil. The other is basically Enuma Elish but with the setup mechanics of Bloodfort Andromeda and with some facets of territory creation.

"Whenever and wherever there is a decline in dharma, O descendant of Bharata, and a rise of adharma - at that time I manifest myself…"


I know that's a motorcycle, not a horse, but please ignore that. Also pretend that the lightning is actually fire. Credit to molee on deviantart.

Class: Ruler

• Alternate Classes: Rider

Name: Kalki
Place of Origin: India
Alignment: Chaotic Good

Parameters:
Strength: A
Agility: C
Endurance: B
Magic: B
Luck: A
Noble Phantasm: EX

Class Skills:

• God's Resolution (A)
  If summoned to oversee a Grail War, Kalki will gain two Command Spells for each of the participating Servants
• True Name Discernment (B)
  If summoned as a Ruler, during a direct encounter, a Servant's true name and entire status information will be automatically revealed. In regards to Servants with concealment abilities, a luck check is required.
• Magic Resistance (A)
  Cancels spells of A rank or below.

Personal Skills:

• Divinity (A)
  As an Avatar of Vishnu, Kalki has divinity of a very high standard, comparable to his fellow avatar Rama.
• Pioneer of the Stars (EX)
  Kalki is the one who will usher in the next Satya Yuga, where the good in man will reign supreme for the next 1728000 years (or so the Puranas claim). A major turning point for humanity, to say the very least.
• Prana Burst (Flames) (C)
  A skill that imbues Kalki's weapons with magical energy, causing them to burst into flames.
• Riding (A+)
  Kalki can ride any animal or vehicle except for dragons.

Noble Phantasm:

Spoiler:

Devadatta: the God-given Stallion (Anti-Army, B)
Kalki's main Noble Phantasm is the white horse he is often depicted with. This horse, Devadatta is a winged stallion comparable in nature to a Pegasus, but not quite as powerful. While he is primarily a means of transportation, he possesses A rank strength and endurance, making him an effective weapon in his own right. On the ground, his normal speed is comparable to a bullet train; in the air, an F-15.

Parabrahman: Evil Slayer (Anti-Evil, A+)
The sword Kalki wields, named after the ultimate form of divinity, possesses an innate advantage over evil. Anything of adharma that it touches will receive massive damage, with the sword being able to bypass even the strongest of both physical and conceptual defenses. If the sword manages to strike a killing blow, the target will be instantly converted into prana and absorbed by Kalki while their souls are stored, giving him more energy; when Kalki dies, these souls will be released and brought into the presence of the Supreme Being rather than having their Origins recycled (or so Kalki claims; there's no way to prove it). However, it loses all its power against beings who act in line with the Dharma, becoming nothing more than a sword backed by A rank strength.

Satya Yuga: Return to the Phantasmal Age (Anti-World, EX)
If Kalki can be sufficiently motivated to participate in the Grail War, he can create a Bounded Field over a certain area via the placing of Vedic verses. Once at least ten verses have been put down in a perimeter, the Bounded Field will proceed to rip the area of the Present World - the world that huamans live on and perceive - contained within it to shreds. The Reverse Side of the World, the layer of reality where the Phantasmal Races fled to at the end of the Age of Gods, will be revealed within the area of the Bounded Field. At this point, the field will begin to grow naturally, but can also be expanded rapidly through the placement of more verse sigils. Within the Bounded Field, Kalki will gain Authority similar to that of a Divine Spirit; this allows him to terraform parts of the Reverse Side to fit the description of the kingdom he will establish in the Satya Yuga. Within this domain Kalki can set up for himself, those who are either in line with the Dharma (or some other form of divinity) or hail from the Age of Gods themselves will receive a rank up in all parameters. Those from the Age of Man and who defy the Dharma will receive two ranks down.

A weaker, more instantaneous version of this ability can be used, albeit with the price of either extreme prana cost or the use of Parabrahman as a Broken Phantasm. Kalki can channel a white, three-armed energy beam that can achieve the same effect of peeling back the Present World. All enemy Bounded Fields that were active in the area will also be dispelled. Even Reality Marbles can be broken by this ability.

Lore:

Spoiler:

A Heroic Spirit who has yet to be born, who has not yet walked upon the Earth yet whose name is already ingrained into the minds of the people. That is the nature of Kalki.

The tenth avatar of the Hindu deity Vishnu, Kalki is foretold as the harbinger of the end, the man who will close this age, the Kali Yuga, and usher in a new golden age, the Satya Yuga, allowing the cycle of the universe to restart. It is foretold that when humanity has completely forgotten the gods, Kalki will appear to rid the world of all wicked kings, false prophets, and evil people and to usher in a new golden age. More cynical magi who know his tale may instead view him as one who will end the Age of Man and begin a new Age of Gods.

Personality:
When summoned as a Servant, he will for at least a brief moment genuinely believe that the end times have come and attempt to end the Kali Yuga. Once this misconception has been cleared up, he will spend the rest of his time summoned in a state of great boredom. If summoned as Ruler, he will perform the task of making sure the Grail War does not go out of hand with unenthusiastic efficiency. If summoned by a Master, he will utterly refuse to contribute more than the minimum effort needed to keep his Master alive.

If his Master (if he has one) can get him to open up, they will find a man who is compassionate and serene, but also very fatalistic, with a belief that: "All things will happen when the time is right. I will usher in the Satya Yuga when the whole world has fallen into depravity. Until then, I stay my hand." However, if one can appeal to his sense of justice, they may be able to convince him to intervene "out of season". No matter if it is the foretold time or not, he cannot sit idle in the face of atrocities.

He has no wish for the Grail, believing himself to merely be the herald of the new age, which will certainly come in time. If presented with the opportunity to accelerate the coming of the Satya Yuga, he will decline, not wishing to upset the balance of the cycle of the Ages. It will take extraordinary circumstances for his convictions to break and for his attitude to shift to a more proactive one.

Miscellaneous:
Likes: the good in the hearts of mankind, divinity
Dislikes: the evil in the hearts of mankind, those who deny or defy divinity
Talents: sword fighting, caring for horses
Natural Enemy: Gilgamesh
Catalyst: a copy of the Kalki Purana in Sanskrit
Notes:

• No matter what class he is summoned in, he will always have his horse.
• Do NOT enter into a cosmological or religious debate with him. Even with updated information concerning the nature of magic and reality from the Holy Grail, his still holds fast to his Hindu viewpoint. If you get him started, you will never hear the end of it.

[Bird of Hermes]

PB Flames so far has only "imbue weapon with prana effect" part in description, presumably because imbuing yourself with fire might set you on fire.

Although tbh I thought it might be a more effective jet burst if it were like making you a literal rocket.

The only description we have for PBF was "Weapon gains 1d6 fire damage" though frankly you can alter the description for whatever character. For my first sheet, I gave Uther a variation that made him look like a burning dragon for the aesthetic.

- - - Updated - - -

Constructman Kalki has had every fault fixed, he's much better now - nice job!

[RoydGolden]

Servant Archer:

True Name: Paris

Alignment: Chaotic Neutral

Alternate Classes: Assassin, Ruler

Strength- D (C)
Agility- B (A)
Endurance- E (D)
Mana- B
Luck- C (D)
NP- B+

Appearance:


Personality: Reviled by history as cowardly and honorless- an irresponsible prince whose fleeting infatuation brought ruin to his kingdom- his true nature is altogether more complex. He is highly passionate, free-spirited, an unrepentant playboy and an insufferable romantic. Someone who will 'never back down on love', no matter the consequences either to himself or to the world at large. For that reason, he does not hold any regrets for his mortal life, even if it did end in tragedy.

He believes strongly in 'the power of love' to overcome obstacles and will speak constantly above love and romance if given the chance. Indeed, calling him a 'love freak' wouldn't so far from the truth. Even while giving her up for Helen, he never abandoned his affections for his first wife Oenone. He views himself as 'cursed' for being born so full of love, a force too strong and bountiful to ever limit itself to one person. He loves beautiful women of all kinds and, upon meeting any female rivals in the War, he is almost sure to dramatically 'proclaim his love' for them and request that they join sides, acting heartbroken if they decline. He is 'pure id' acting on every stray impulse and desire that crosses his mind, not knowing the meaning of 'restraint'. Still, he is not exactly a 'bad person' and his devotion to love is admirable, though bringing disaster in his life.

He finds war and bloodshed distasteful, preferring to avoid such things altogether if given the choice. In the Grail War where this is not possible, he will enter battle, albeit reluctantly. In combat, he is astoundingly ruthless and will not hestitate to take advantage of enemy's weak-points to force a preemptive victory. Though without regrets, he does have a wish- to once again embrace his beloved Helen and Oenone in his arms.

Likes: 'power of love', Helen, beautiful women
Dislikes: war, personal danger, no sense of romance
Talents: impartial judgement, composing love poetry
Natural Enemy: Menelaus, Hector


Class Skills:

Independant Action (C)- The ability to remain in existence without recieving mana from one's Master. At this rank, Archer can remain in this world for one day without active contract.

Magic Resistance (C-)- Cancel spells with a chant below two verses. Cannot defend against Magecraft on the level of High-Thaumaturgy and Greater Rituals. Due to a certain Skill of his, effectiveness is halved regarding charm and seduction based spells.


Personal Skills:

Affections Of The Goddess (B)- Denotes the boosting of parameters due to possessing divine favor. Archer was favored by Aphrodite- goddess of love- for judging her beauty to be greatest amongst the Olympian goddesses. He was promised the most beautiful women in the mortal world- Helen of Sparta- as a reward, which instigated the war that eventually lead to Troy's destruction and Paris's own demise. All parameters other then Luck and Mana are treated as Rank-Up upon entering battle.

Clairvoyance (C)- Enhanced visual perception. At this rank, Archer is capable of accurate aim in a four-kilometer range as well as being able to track down moving targets with considerable ease.

Beauty Of Trouble With Women (B)- Nature of one who is misfortunate in love. Grants bonuses when it comes to attracting women, while at the same time declining one's own resistance to charm effects originating from women. Due to the influence of this Skill, Archer's Luck is permanently reduced by one ranking.


Noble Phantasms:


Tóxo Apóllona- Sun God's Guiding Hand (B+, Anti-Unit): A Noble Phantasm embodying Archer's role in the demise of Achilles. With the help of Polyxena- a Trojan princess to whom Achilles found himself smitten with, Paris conspired to lure unknowing Achilles to a temple of Apollo under the pretense of making a sacrifice to commemerate their newfound marriage. That sacrifice was in fact Achilles's life. Taking aim from the shadows, Paris let fly with an arrow- guided by Apollo himself to strike the hero's one weakness- his heel. Achilles died in the arms of his friend Odysseus, betrayed and in agony. An ignoble end to a great hero.

As a Noble Phantasm, it takes the form of an ornate gold and silver bow that shines brightly like the sun. It is a Divine Construct, permitted to touch mortal hands for the sole purpose of slaying Achilles. For Archer to use it so freely in the Grail War could even be considered a kind of blasphemy, not that he cares for such things. Every arrow fired from it is endowed with the conceptual property of 'belonging to the sun god Apollo', turning them from ordinary arrows into piercing rays of pure solar light which can burn through most defenses.

When its True Name is invoked, the next arrow fired becomes a 'homing ray' that pursues the designated target relentlessly, utilizing the refraction phenomenon of light to change its trajectory countless times in rapid succession. The 'target' in question can be a certain person or even a specific body part- such as one's heel. The arrow will only stop if its met with an opposing force of equal magical energy, if the target escapes from its maximum effective range or if Archer is killed.


Aphrodite Diásosis- Oh Goddess, Protect Me (B, Support): A Noble Phantasm representing the incident in which Aphrodite herself intervened in a duel between Paris and Menelaus. She spirited the Trojan prince off the battlefield and back to his bedquarters in the moment before Menelaus could land the deciding blow.

Once invoked, space itself is warped to remove Archer from danger's grasp, bringing him to the nearest 'safe area' whether that be his own room, his Master's side or simply somewhere far enough away from his attacker. A teleportation effect at the level of True Magic, comparable in power to a Command Seal. It is the perfect 'retreat' ability, allowing Archer to escape situations and battles that would otherwise be sure to end in his death. As it's essentially 'divine intervention' no mana from Archer or his Master is required to utilize it. But it can only be called upon once every five days. Also, Archer himself does not necessarily know where he'll end up after using it, only 'away from danger'.

[SpoonyViking]

Constructman, we usually edit the original post instead of making a new one.

[Nuclear]

He sounds less like a Ruler and more like a Saver class Servant.

[RoydGolden]

Anybody care to give feedback for my Paris sheet? I'd appreciate it.

[Constructman]

Constructman, we usually edit the original post instead of making a new one.

Oh, sorry. I was worried nobody would notice, and I saw somebody else make new posts with... I think it was Dietrich von Bern or something. Will keep in mind though.

- - - Updated - - -

He sounds less like a Ruler and more like a Saver class Servant.

Isn't the condition for the Saver class that it will only respond to an individual who has vast anguish that cannot be ignored or something? Given that the only Saver we've seen in the franchise so far is Gautama Buddha, I don't think that really fits Kalki, who's legend is basically... Killing people en masse and establishing a new golden age. He doesn't really fit the "Heroic Spirit of Salvation" or whatever Twice called it.

[Constructman]

Anybody care to give feedback for my Paris sheet? I'd appreciate it.

Looking over Paris, a few things come to mind

• Where is the talent of impartial judgement coming from? From his profile, he seems to be the personification of the Id. Am I missing something? Particularly, if summoned as Ruler, I wouldn't be surprised if he tried to stack the deck against or for a certain team if they appeal to his sense of romance, something Rulers aren't supposed to do unless things go completely out the window (IE: Darnicula).
• I'm wondering if Evaporation of Sanity could work as a skill here. Probably Rank E, because Paris comes across less as an airhead, more really impulsive, but it could technically work.
• Tóxo Apóllona is described as a blasphemy; perhaps you could work that into the function of the NP? Say, if Paris uses it too many times, the Elementals in the area start getting riled up, or maybe even Apollo himself shows up in a really bad mood? Something similar to how summoning Siegfried will also summon Fafnir in some capacity.
• Statwise, he looks okay. He seems optimized for sniping and hit-and-run, especially with Aphrodite Diásosis as a last resort.

Admittedly, I barely know anything about the Iliad, so I'm sort of talking out of thin air here.

[RoydGolden]

First off, thanks for the feedback! I'll address your points in the order you made them.

-Paris was renowned for his honesty in the myths. That's why he was chosen amongst mortals to arbitrate the 'beauty contest' between Aphrodite, Athena and Hera, since the gods were sure he'd give an unbiased assessment. This was the whole 'apple of Discord' incident which lead to the Trojan War. Unfortunately, no matter which way he chose, he'd still be pissing off two very powerful goddesses. Ruler Class is a bit of a stretch given his personality, but I thought it fit that aspect of his legend.

-I actually considered giving him that Skill when first coming up with the sheet.

-The whole blasphemy thing is my invention, it's not from the Illiad itself. In fact, there's no mention of a special bow at all in the poem, that's just my extrapolation of the 'guided by the hands of Apollo' bit. Adding that to the NP would detract from the core idea behind it, IMO. It already has super sunlight arrows and homing shot, adding any more effects and it'll start to feel a little cluttered. Not a bad idea in and of itself though, might end up saving it for a later sheet someday.

-Yeah, hit-and-run is pretty much how I envisioned him.

[Constructman]

First off, thanks for the feedback! I'll address your points in the order you made them.

-Paris was renowned for his honesty in the myths. That's why he was chosen amongst mortals to arbitrate the 'beauty contest' between Aphrodite, Athena and Hera, since the gods were sure he'd give an unbiased assessment. This was the whole 'apple of Discord' incident which lead to the Trojan War. Unfortunately, no matter which way he chose, he'd still be pissing off two very powerful goddesses. Ruler Class is a bit of a stretch given his personality, but I thought it fit that aspect of his legend.

-I actually considered giving him that Skill when first coming up with the sheet.

-The whole blasphemy thing is my invention, it's not from the Illiad itself. In fact, there's no mention of a special bow at all in the poem, that's just my extrapolation of the 'guided by the hands of Apollo' bit. Adding that to the NP would detract from the core idea behind it, IMO. It already has super sunlight arrows and homing shot, adding any more effects and it'll start to feel a little cluttered. Not a bad idea in and of itself though, might end up saving it for a later sheet someday.

-Yeah, hit-and-run is pretty much how I envisioned him.

Thanks for clearing things up. Other than those things (which you cleared up), I think he's great.