A better starting point would just be make up your own stuff inspired by the original text, because that guy's ideas are very bad.
A better starting point would just be make up your own stuff inspired by the original text, because that guy's ideas are very bad.
Fair enough. At least with GO now we're slowly filling in the holes for canon skill fluff.
Haven’t posted in awhile, mainly because I had a lot of work, and didn’t have a lot of ideas that were worth hashing out. Liked this one enough to write it up, though. What do you guys think?
Servant Caster: Lorenzo de’ Medici
Found here (x)
Servant Caster:
True Name: Lorenzo de’ Medici
Alignment: Lawful Neutral
Alternate Class(es): None
Strength- D
Agility- C
Endurance- D
Mana- B
Luck- B
NP- A
Background: Known as the greatest of the Medici, Lorenzo de’ Medici was a master statesman, skilled ruler of Florence, and above all an illustrious patron. His life was directly tied to the greatest years of the Renaissance. Through his patronage, he was responsible for some of the world-famous talents of the Renaissance. Some of the artists he financed and educated, like Leonardo da Vinci, would go on to become Heroic Spirits, in no small part due to his influence. Machiavelli once called Lorenzo Medici “the greatest patron of literature and art that any prince has ever been”. Because he fused incredibly talent as a statesman with a farsighted love for and support of the arts and culture, Lorenzo shaped the Renaissance to a greater extent than virtually any of his contemporaries.
Personality: After a lifetime as a diplomat, Lorenzo makes friends easily. He is calm, easygoing, and a great joke-teller. He also has a deep love for the Arts, and spends his downtime during a Grail War studying art and poetry from after his death. Lorenzo particularly loves modern art; he finds the philosophy behind it fascinating. Lorenzo would get along fairly well with just about any Master. He is courteous, even to those he does not particularly like. If his master is young, Lorenzo may act as a father-figure for them, teaching them and helping them develop as a person, as he once did for Michelangelo. Such a master may soon discover a greater interest in both the Arts and a terrible spending habit. Lorenzo also has a great deal of respect for most other Servants, especially if they are involved in the Arts or are from Greco-Roman antiquity. If the servant is both, like Plato or Socrates, he may break his normally calm mold and (for lack of a better word) “fanboy.”
His wish for the Grail is to possess all the art that will ever be created. However, merely being able to get a glimpse at the future of art through his summoning is an opportunity he is deeply grateful for.
Likes: Art (especially modern art), his family, his brother, the artists he financed
Dislikes: the Pazzi family, those who do not value art
Talents: Patronage, Poetry
Natural Enemy: Anyone involved in the Pazzi conspiracy
Class Skills:
Territory Creation (B)- A Servant's skill at constructing advantageous terrain for themselves. At B-rank, it is possible for this Servant to build a workshop.
Item Construction (E+)- Leonardo da Vinci was among the innumerable number of artists financed by Lorenzo, and Lorenzo learned principles of engineering and design from him. Lorenzo is capable of producing engineering works similar (yet lower in quality) to those of Da Vinci. He is also capable of producing high-quality yet non-magical poetry, and will occasionally do so in his spare time.
Personal Skills:
Renaissance Man (B)-A skill embodying the ideals of Renaissance thinkers. It refers to the basic humanist belief that man is limitless in his capacities for development, and should thus embrace all knowledge and develop their own capacities as fully as possible. This thinking was popularized during the Renaissance. This skill grants Expert of Many Specializations and Pioneer of the Stars at equivalent ranks.
Golden Rule (B-)- Measure’s one’s ability to acquire wealth. Patrons of the Renaissance were fabulously wealthy, and Lorenzo was no exception. At B rank, the Servant will be able to acquire a fortune. However, the money is not infinite, especially considering Lorenzo’s spending habits. As a lifelong patron, he spent an exorbitant amount of his money on artwork and will do so as a servant as well. If left to his own devices for too long, his master may soon find an considerable increase in the amount of artwork they possess and a considerable decrease in the amount of funds available to them.
Eye for Art (A+)- Lorenzo was at the center of both Renaissance Arts and the rediscovery of Greco-Roman art and ideas. At this rank, any heroic spirit with a connection to the Arts from either the Renaissance or Greco-Roman antiquity will be recognized almost immediately. While not immediate, he will also have an easier time identifying Heroic Spirits from Greek and Roman myths. In addition, if he has had time to research the Arts since his summoning, he will gain this skill (in a lower rank) for more modern heroic spirits tied to the Arts.
High Speed Divine Words (False) (B): High-Speed Divine Words are the power to activate Thaumaturgy incredibly fast and without the use of Magic Circuits. They are the language of the Age of Gods, originating from back when words played a heavy role in spellcasting. The Age of Gods was long over during Lorenzo’s lifetime, but the ideas of that era were rediscovered during the Renaissance. Along with those ideas came the knowledge of High Speed Divine Words. Lorenzo worked with various other Renaissance Men and created a modified version usable in the Age of Man, based around the modern rules of Magecraft and utilizing Magic Circuits. While fundamentally different in nature, it’s effect is largely the same, allowing for nearly instant spellcasting. However, Lorenzo’s method is still regular Magecraft, and thus drains far more mana than High Speed Divine Words (true) and is affected by all levels of Magic Resistance.
Noble Phantasm:
Il Magnifico-Soul of the Renaissance (A, Anti-Unit): Lorenzo, at first glance, was not among the greatest talents of the Renaissance; such a title should surely belong to masters of their crafts like Leonardo da Vinci and Michelangelo. In truth, however, Lorenzo was unparalleled in his own field: bringing out the talent of others. Through his patronage, he allowed other Renaissance Men to reach their fullest potential. Genius artists and philosophers, including Piero and Antonio del Pollaiuolo, Andrea del Verrocchio, Sandro Botticelli, Domenico Ghirlandaio, Leonardo da Vinci, and Michelangelo Buonarroti, were instrumental in creating the masterpieces of the Renaissance, and Lorenzo guided every one of them. It is for this reason that he is considered the central figure of the Renaissance; without him, the Renaissance as we know it could not exist.
Lorenzo’s Phantasm represents the concept of “guiding and helping achieve one’s fullest potential.” Upon invoking his Phantasm’s name and selecting a target, that target simply...becomes better than they were before. They gain a rank up in all parameters, but more than that, they achieve more of their potential, either by unlocking hidden abilities or improving existing abilities. If used on a weak human like Shirou Emiya at the start of Fate, he would immediately gain access to his Unlimited Blade Works Reality Marble (but would lack knowledge of how to use it to it’s fullest extent). However, the Phantasm is not limited to humans. Humanist philosophies state that potential is limitless, and thus even a Heroic Spirit can become stronger. If used on Hercules, for example, he would regenerate lives faster and would gain an additional three lives, allowing him to surprise an unprepared opponent. He may also use it on himself, making his High Speed Divine Words (False) more powerful and in general making him more dangerous.
Lorenzo can even use Il Magnifico on multiple people at the same time. The more servants he uses his Phantasm on, the greater the mana cost, of course. Maintaining two could be done for a very long period of time. Three to four would require significantly more mana, leaving Caster with a decreased ability to fight using High Speed Divine Words (False). Attempting to use his ability on five to seven people for a battle would almost certainly end up killing Lorenzo.
This Noble Phantasm represents the concept of “helping other achieve their fullest potential,” and is a worthy Phantasm for “Lorenzo the Magnificent.”
Tactics:
High-Speed Divine Words (False), using his Noble Phantasm on himself, and his minor skills with engineering will help him stay alive in a tight spot, but he is best used as a support Servant. He would especially shine in an Apocrypha-style scenario. Eye for Art can provide valuable information about the enemy Servants, and Golden Rule can provide some funds for the team. Il Magnifico is obviously a game-changing ability during such a War, and may determine who wins or loses certain battles or possibly even the Grail War.
In more standard Grail Wars, his usefulness is decreased, but is far from entirely diminished. His Master’s best chance at victory is to form alliances. If they are able to pull that off, Lorenzo and his master have a good chance at victory. If there are no available allies, it will likely take a large amount of tactical thinking and luck to pull off a victory. (Unless the War has weaker than average Servants.)
Last edited by 4score7years; November 17th, 2016 at 11:56 AM.
At the very least, the information on Magic Resistance presented there is wildly off. Cancelling spells in the vicinity was never mentioned as an effect of that Skill (and in fact, Jeanne's EX-ranked Magic Resistance is specifically noted as only defending herself in area-of-effect attacks). The idea of quantifying an EX rank also seems misplaced, given that EX is by its very nature outside the existing scale.
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Lorenzo: Pretty well-done and I like the idea behind his False variant of High-Speed Divine Words, though admittedly I'm not too sure how well it fits into canon. Is his NP solely limited to ranking up parameters, though? While I understand the basic idea of 'bringing out the talents of others', that specific interpretation of it seems pretty boring. Maybe make it something more elaborate like it also brings out any 'hidden abilities' the target might have? For instance, if it was used on pre-Fate Shirou he'd suddenly be able to access Unlimited Blade Works.
You could probably give him Expert Of Many Specializations or some variant of it, given that Renaissance artists were pretty much known to specialize in freaking everything.
Also, for such a modern figure Mana seems a little bit too high. I'd maybe consider lowering it by one rank.
First of all, thanks for the feedback. Your suggestion for his NP is actually sweet! I'll definitely incorporate that into the sheet (when I'm not so tired I'm about to collapse.) Might include some examples based on canon servants.
Was thinking about Expert of Many Specializations and Pioneer of the Stars fusion-danced into one skill Renaissance Man. Will probably also write that up when I am less exhausted.
Mana is indeed too high. I put it at A because of an earlier iteration of the phantasm which was basically just a Mana-battery for Servants. I thought it was uninteresting, scrapped it, and forgot to change the rank down.
Really good, though I probably would have made him Lawful Evil, though that's just me as I associate most Renaissance leaders as that.
Oh, I just had an idea, has anybody made a sheet about Pope Alexander VI/Rodrigo Borgia, or Lucrezia Borgia and giving them Innocent Monster, Or Cesare Borgia and giving him a unique skill or noble phantasm base off "The Prince"?
...dammnit i'm already working on a Servant already.
You could. I chose to portray him as a wise and capable patron behind the greatest minds of the Renaissance, but you could easily portray him in a more negative light. In fact, I'd be interested to see someone's take on that.
Barring that, I agree that there has gotta be more Renaissance Heroic Spirits in this thread. Interested to see what you come up with!
Faceclaim
Class: Rider
Alignment: Lawful Good
Origin: Historical
Region: United States
Likes: Horses
Dislikes: The British, rain, staying up all night
Natural Enemies: Governor William Tryon
Parameters:
STR: E
EDU: D
AGI: C
MANA: B
LUCK: A
NP: A+
Class Skills:
Riding: A(+)
All creatures but those of Phantasmal Beast and Divine Beast-rank can be used as mounts. When using her Noble Phantasm Unsung Midnight Ride, this skill is raised by a rank.
Magic Resistance: E
Cannot cancel spells, but magic damage is reduced somewhat.
Personal Skills
Bravery: (B)
The ability to shrug off and ignore mental interferences. This comes from Rider's ability to follow a path in the dark of night, in the middle of a rainstorm and before an advancing army.
Disengage: (C/A)
During Rider's defining exploit, she fought off a bandit alone as she rode during a storm and after riding hard for several hours. Normally, this skill is rank C, which allow her to reset the state of battle, but would allow for pursuit by an enemy. When on a steed or vehicle, however, this skill allows Rider to exit combat without having to reset the battle, escaping with minimal damage from a single combatant or pursuer. For every pursuer after the first, Rider must make a Luck check to escape
Colonial Charm: (A)
This skill reflects Rider's ability to remain unassuming despite her achievement, which remained unrecognized for nearly a century after her death. A mixture of her youth, humble personality, and unassuming appearance, people are quick to dismiss her as a threat. Servants will feel something off if they interact with Rider, but unless they possess a skill like Discernment of the Poor or are insane enough to assume she is a Servant, they will dismiss her as merely an oddity. This skill is negated as soon as she does something to disprove that view, for example using any of her Noble Phantasms negates this skill to any who view her using them.
Noble Phantasm:
Prodding StickLiberty Grant Me Speed
Type: Anti-unit
Rank: B+
An unassuming stick that looks more like a branch than a switch, this Noble Phantasm's effect is two fold. When Rider activates this Noble Phantasm and strikes it against an object that could be qualified as a "land vehicle", Rider gains complete control of the vehicle. The object becomes an E-Ranked Noble Phantasm and the stick morphs into an object that can "make the vehicle faster". For example, if used of a motorcycle the switch morphs into an actual switch that connects to a "nitro" system that pumps prana into the vehicle to allow it to go faster than it was physically meant to. This phantasm is destroyed if the vehicle is destroyed while Rider is using it on teh the vehicle. As well, the transport will begin to break down if pushed to hard. The rate of of deterioration is dependent on quality, for example a rusty scooter may only last a few minutes at best, while a high end motorcycle my last an for a half a day under strenuous conditions.
Unsung Midnight RideFrom Home to Carmel to Mahopac to Kent Cliffs to Farmers Mills and Back Home Again.
Type: Anti-Unit
Rank: A+
The manifestation of Rider's legendary ride that was double Paul Revere's own ride. This manifests as a forty mile circuit of muddy roads, bitch black darkness, and heavy rain and winds that that Rider rides through. Rider's Riding skill is raised a rank, and any vehicle Rider is own is transformed into a D-Ranked Phantasmal Beast in the shape of a horse and loses any abilities it may have had in it's original form. Rider has the ability to use this ability to make shorter trips of eight miles each for a total of five times, one for each stop she made in her real trip. She can still use her skills and other Noble Phantasm as she rides. The Horse suffers no detrimental effects of overusing Prodding Stick, in fact it goes even faster than a normal vehicle would and if the Beast is destroyed, the other is unharmed.
Pursuing enemies are also pulled into the manifestation. Servants on a non-Noble Phantasm transport have their vehicle transformed into a horse similar to Rider, however it is nothing more than a simple horse. As well enemy Servants receive down ranks to their Agility and Endurance for as long as they are in the manifestation. If the Servant has a Riding skill of equal or higher than Rider, they must make a Luck roll to catch up to Rider and attempt to stop her. For those who do not have the Riding skill they immediately wipe out if on a vehicle, or, if on foot, lose sight of Rider. To those servants or those who fail to catch Rider before she reaches her destination, they are instantly transported in a random direction the number of miles Rider has travelled.
If Rider is knocked off her mount, or she or her mount are slain, the manifestation ends with no effect except that Rider no longer has access to this Noble Phantasm and she is at the mercy of her captor.
Identity
Spoiler:
The ideas are nice, but there's definitely a little work to do.
For example, mostly everything aside from the parameters is ranked too highly, I think. Even then, I doubt a Revolutionary era Rider with no history of magic would have Mana at rank B, but that's just me. Riding is ranked far too high. B rank with your choice of +'s should be the highest a Rider with no history of Phantasmal/Divine Beasts should be allowed.
Bravery is ranked too highly for someone who simply rode a dark and stormy trail one night--especially when you see that Lu Bu is the only canon possessor of Bravery of that rank.
Disengage would be fine at C, the rank up while on a mount seems redundant and unnecessary. Uncrowned Arms Mastery would be a decent filler for Colonial Charm, or maybe something like Powerless Shell, unless you already thought of that.
While I like the idea of a skeleton key branch, having it at a higher rank than Gae Bolg is just silly. Unsung Midnight Ride also seems like more of a Reality Marble+other thing than just an Anti-Unit NP. It needs some tweaking and a definite downgrade.
Sorry if this seems like a wall, I don't want to seem like I'm calling out any faults for no reason.
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A story from the old country I wanted to share. Surprised I was able to find a written resource for an oral tradition but here he is.
The Lore section is going to be a bit thick this time, but only because I haven't found a summary for the story anywhere else online.
Source: http://www.zerochan.net/1297884#full
Class: Saber
Alignment: Neutral Good
Origin: Folklore
Region: Ireland
Parameters
Strength: C
Endurance: B
Agility: C
Mana: C
Luck: C
NP: C
Class Skills:
Magic Resistance: (C)
The ability to cancel or diminish the effects of magecraft used against oneself.
Saber's skill at combating magic is virtually unknown. Therefore, he is ascribed an average rank.
Riding: (C)
The ability to ride modern vehicles and use animals as mounts.
Saber's skill in riding is virtually unknown. Therefore, he is ascribed an average rank.
Personal Skills:
Battle Continuation: (A-)
The ability to continue fighting despite injuries. This level of Battle Continuation makes it possible to fight even with deadly injuries until their prana is exhausted and to remain alive so long as one does not receive a decisive fatal wound. Bonus Effect of gaining a high chance of escaping combat and reaching allied territory alive after being defeated. In his final conflict with his stepmother, Saber's heart was torn out of his body. Despite receiving a wound more than fatal, in his last few moments Saber was able to tear his stepmother's heart out as well, earning a Pyrrhic victory.
Information Erasure: (C)
The removal of information regarding the Servant's true name, abilities, and appearance from the records and memories of all witnesses, including the opponent, following the conclusion of an engagement. Using physical senses alone, even trained combatants on the level of Servants will be unable to retain the relevant information. However, by consulting digital recordings, it is possible to retain the information.
Because Saber has no "true" identity and was never once named or addressed in his story, the ability to retain information on a person who may or may not have even existed is justifiably difficult. It can also be said that an enemy learning his true name won't be able to make any use of it, ensuring Saber doesn't suffer a loss in tactical advantage.
Speak With Dead: (C)
The ability to communicate with the dead.
Saber has shown the ability to communicate with the dead in the form of misty apparitions appearing from the body parts of the dead. At this rank, Saber can quickly consume the most vital information and ideas, but only from the recently deceased.
Noble Phantasm
Lore
Personality
Tactics
Last edited by Ail Don; November 14th, 2016 at 05:13 AM.
wrong
melee damage and mental defense are part of the package
E, B, A+ are the only examples so far
No clarification about the difference between ranks yet.
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but this is a fanfic thread even if it's not in the fanfic forum for some reason, so of course you can make up what you like.
Last edited by mewarmo990; November 14th, 2016 at 05:20 AM.
Is E noted as boosting melee damage as well? The way I'd seen it worded was 'At A+ rank, melee damage is also boosted' which kind of implies it isn't at lower ranks, but maybe that was just an artifact of translation. You're right that there's been no clarification about differing ranks though, so one just has to make that stuff up.
I've decided to finally give in to temptation and to made my first genderbended servant. As a side-note, I changed a few bits in the sheet of "her" ancestor Brutus.
Class: Caster
True Name: Bladud
Alignment: Lawful Good
Likes: Experiments, Pigs, Hot Spring
Dislikes: Crashing, Making Mistakes
Personality: Caster is a cheerful young woman with a love for experimenting. She greatly enjoys thinking of new types of mystic codes and learning about spells from her ghostly mentors. Whenever she discovers a new magical skill, she will spend a lot of time exploring it's applications and limitations. She admires more famous sorcerer and builder of magical artifacts and if meeting them, will ask them many question about spellcasting and/or object constructing. She particularly admires Daedalus and even imitated one of his most famous wonders. She adores pigs, seeing them as absolutely adorable and like caring for them. She also enjoys relaxing and resting in hot springs.
She is pretty perfectionist and will spend days correcting any mistake that she make in her creation. For that reason, she is greatly embarrassed by her last work and her wish for the Holy Grail would be to correct her mistake while making it in her legend.
source:http://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.p...st_id=59915018Spoiler:
Stats-
Strength- E
Endurance- D
Agility- C
Mana- A
Luck- C
NP- B
Class Skills-
Territory Creation- A
Ability to establish a territory advantageous to one's power as a Magus. At this rank, creation of a Temple, superior to a workshop, is possible. Caster built the town Caervaddon, now called Bath, and the temple Aqua Suilis in honor of the goddess Minerva.
Item Construction- A
The ability to create magical objects and tool. Caster can create a wide variety of powerful mystic codes.
Personal Skills-
Charisma- B
The ability to lead a country and be supported by its people. Caster served as Queen of Britain.
Divinity- E
The measure of how much the servant is close to being a Divine Spirit. It can be lowered by their monstrous nature or their dislike of the god. It has the effect of lowering special defenses. Caster count amongst her ancestors Aeneas, son of the goddess Venus.
Protection of the Faith- C
Skill denoting those who sacrificed themselves for a religious view. It is not a blessing from a higher being, but rather an absolution of the body and the soul. As such, it serves as a protection from mental and physical alteration. It may alter personality at high rank. Caster was the leader of a cult to Minerva.
Communication with the Afterlife- B
Ability to speak with the souls of the defunct to hear their advices. It allows the use of any skill that require simple knowledge or use of magic at C-rank, such as Military Tactics, Eye for Art or Withcraft. Furthermore, the servant can speak with willing souls of the deceased to obtain miscellaneous information. It was said that Caster obtained her magic power and her knowledge by practicing necromancy (the act of divination by speaking with the dead).
Noble Phantasm-
Aqua Sulis ~ Glory to the Goddess of Wisdom
(Anti-Unit, C+) To decorate the temple she built in honor of Minerva, Caster created Mystic Codes that took the form of of magical fires that would transform into ball of stones when their flames were too lowered and then replaced imediatly replaced by another fire. By activating this Noble Phantasm, a ball of fire that look like a tiny sun will form itself on top of Caster's staff. She will then be able to shoot it at her opponent, upon wich it will immediatly be replaced by another fireball. This attack's strength depends on the distance between Caster and her enemy. Indeed, if used in close contact, it will completely incinerate weaker opponents such as Assassin-class servant., but the more distance it moves, the more it's flame will grow weaker until it became nothing but a ball of rock. While the damage it does in this form is not insignificant, it is still nothing compared to its strength in melee.
Caervaddon ~ Hot Spring Of Restoration
(Anti-Unit, D) While she was studying Liberal Arts in Athens during her time as a princess, Caster caught leprosy. As a result, when she returned home, she had to go into hiding by working as a swineherd. While travelling with her herd, she discovered mud that mixed itself with magical waters which cured her when she accidentally made contact with it. She then returned home and, after being crowned queen, built the city Caervaddon near the place of her discovery and set up hot springs that used the magical water. Now, Caster can recreate one of those miraculous hot springs inside an area that she claimed as her territory. Anyone that bathes in the waters will be cured of whatever ailments they had, be they sickness, poison or wounds. Furthermore, the experience is extremely relaxing and pleasurable, allowing it to be used as a good resting room for her and her master.
Icarus Brittaniae ~ Mechanicals Wings of Experimentation
(Anti-Self, B) Caster's last Mystic Code and the one that led her to her doom. Fascinated by the tale of Icarus and Daedalus, she decided to create her own set of wings that would allow her to fly through the air. She decided to make them out of metal so that they could resist whatever obstacles she met. It worked for a while, allowing her to travel through the air anywhere she wanted. However, it seems she missed the point of the tales, and she eventually overloaded her wings by putting too much strain on them. She lost control of them, causing her to flew erratically and crash on the ground, thereby robbing her of her life.
She can infuse mana into the mechanical wings fused to her back to activate them and allow her to fly. Her speed while flying is dependant on the amount of mana she put into her wings. With only a little mana, it pretty much consist of a rank-up to her agility that grant her more liberty of movement, while using almost all of her mana would allow her to reach supersonic speed. However, the faster she flies, the less control she has over her wings. Even at lower speed, she has difficulty remaining steady and loses accuracy when trying to shoot her opponent using Aqua Sulis. At higher speed, her wings will grow completely out of control , making her need almost all of her concentration just to go in a general direction of her choosing. Furthermore, if she crashes into anything, they will explode, causing damage on both her and the "landing point" depending on the amount of mana they had at the moment of the crash. After that, Caster will need at least a week to grow them back if she is lucky enough to survive.
Last edited by Alexcoene; November 15th, 2016 at 04:54 AM.
I like it, it seems like she'd be a tactical servant like the archetypal caster and she's pretty darn versatile too. Nice job.
Only one thing I'd change, Julius Caesar has the same ancestry and his Divinity is D so you may want to alter that..
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A Servant's class doesn't define their role.
Last edited by mewarmo990; November 14th, 2016 at 03:53 PM.