Create-A-Servant 2

[Draconic]

Oh god… now I'm tempted to do Lucifer just to see him done well…

[RoydGolden]

Oh god… now I'm tempted to do Lucifer just to see him done well…

I remember seeing a pretty good Lucifer sheet back on the old thread. One of his NPs was calling on meteors of light to rain from the sky representing the rebel angels who fell from heaven, I think.

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Oh, here it was.

[sherlock1110]

It's going to be Cain all over again

Oh god… now I'm tempted to do Lucifer just to see him done well…

Fear not, only in your infinitely wise hands can any sheet be done well. Nobody else can be trusted to enact your vision of this thread.

[Draconic]

I've always felt a great deal of sympathy for Lucifer. I have part of the sheet finished already, so I'll post his history and one Noble Phantasm for now, just because venomking's was so bad.

Spoiler:

Caster

“Something to think about before you go moan about your bad fortune in summoning me; I steal souls, but don’t you ever wonder why?”

Strength: B
Endurance: C
Agility: B/?? (He can simply appear just about anywhere as long as he has some time to focus)
Mana A+
Luck: E–EX
NP: EX


Alignment: Lawful Neutral
Height: ____
Weight: 40kg/60kg

Class Skills:

Magic Resistance: A
Cancel spells with a chant below three verses. Even if targeted by High-Thaumaturgy and Greater Rituals, it is difficult for them to be affected.

Riding: C
????

Bravery: A+
????

Guardian Knight: A
????

Mana Defence: A+
????

Bio:
There was once an angel in heaven greater than all the others. His name meant The Light, and indeed, that is what he was. He was not merely an angel. He was God’s favorite amongst the angels. And as was the case for all those who played favorites with people in the Biblical texts, tragedy befell everyone involved.

Caster is that angel. His name is Lucifer, and due to his preferential treatment, he grew arrogant, and eventually, this culminated with him sitting upon God’s throne… and getting caught. God was furious, and cast him out from Heaven, but he did give him an avenue to return: He must acquire the souls of a certain number of people, dooming them to burn in the fires of the Inferno. Only then may he return to Heaven.

Lucifer was horrified beyond belief. Why would God, the one infallible being he knew of make such a decree?!

Furthermore, Satan himself was treated better, and he was little more than a mischievous imp! Satan, who God would periodically send to Earth to test certain individuals, was still allowed in Heaven, though he chose not to return.

Now Lucifer was being punished by being forced to live in the same fiery cesspit of sin, and the only way to return to his rightful place was to steal the souls of people who were merely trying to live their lives?! What manner of nonsense was this?! Lucifer waited in Hell for God to change his mind for hundreds of years, but no such thing happened. And so, finally, he gave in. Hell was intolerable! He hated every moment he spent in its hideous depths, and he would get out! And until then he would spend his days cursing God. Because a God that demanded that the souls of his subjects be tormented forever for inane reasons without even giving an explanation for why that should be was a monster, not a supreme being. And to that end he made his decision:

He would become part of the darkness in men’s hearts, just like God’s favored troublemaker.

He began doing the job assigned to him and went about collecting souls, taking satisfaction in the acquisition of each one, simply because the pitiable humans made it so easy. He never could take joy in his work however. He granted wishes at the cost of eternity. Nothing was worth that, but the humans were all so shortsighted. He would have found it hilarious if it didn’t also make him sick.

And he continues to do his filthy job even to this day, though a fragment of his existence now dwells within the throne.

Upon being summoned as a heroic spirit, he is often met with distrust and revulsion. He doesn’t blame his masters for feeling that way, though he does think it’s rather silly of them: After all, they summoned his spirit from the Throne, making him little more than their thrall; a pawn to be used by someone else to do something they rather wouldn’t, just as he always has.

But should they react as he expects them to, before he obeys a single command, he always poses his Masters the same question. “I was cast out of heaven for sitting on a fancy chair when I really shouldn’t have. For that, I was thrown down into Hell. Yet your God didn’t let it rest; Somehow, the only way for me to get back into heaven is to do the icky job. I steal souls because it was what God ordered me to do! Even as a monster hated by all, and who curses His very name, I am still stuck doing His bidding! So tell me, who is the real bad guy in this scenario?”

He has never gotten an answer.


Noble Phantasm:
Soul Harvest (By God’s Will Alone You Are Lost): (EX)
Type: Anti-Unit
Caster’s most hideous power: In most cases, to steal a soul, he must forge a contract. When the subject is wary of him, he must create a lease, and manipulate events to ensure that the signer cannot hold up their end, thus letting him keep their collateral.

Soul Harvest however bypasses all of that: it doesn’t kill the target. It steals their soul, removing their free will, and giving him complete control over the target. There is no resistance to this ability as its effects are immediate and there is no defense against an attack directed at the immortal soul.

Any human he uses this power on has their soul stolen from them, and are immediately damned to burn in hell upon their death, and will immediately realize this. The loss of one’s soul results in the reaction to witnessing or experiencing anything being emotional pain. The damned cannot find joy in anything; they cannot hate anything; everything simply ceases to matter. Some lose the will to live and kill themselves, unable to cope with the thought that all that awaits them is an eternity of torment. Others do everything they can to stay alive, even if that means resorting to inhuman behavior. Either way, they are doomed to suffer in the afterlife.

However, as Heroic Spirits are soul-based existences, they are uniquely vulnerable: Though he cannot damn them to hell, with the loss of their souls, they lose their identity, memories, and all emotions. Furthermore, they lose their anchor to this world, meaning that the moment Caster releases them from his control, they immediately vanish.

There is nothing that Lucifer hates more than using this ability, and the only way he will use it is if someone does something truly monstrous.

---Yeah, this is pretty alternative, but I've always liked the thought of the Devil just being misunderstood. Also, it needs a lot of formatting…
Also, I'm not a Satanist. Actually, that's one of the things that's going to be part of his personality. He gets really bent out of shape whenever someone confuses him with Satan just because they're both 'The Devil.'

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It's going to be Cain all over again


Fear not, only in your infinitely wise hands can any sheet be done well. Nobody else can be trusted to enact your vision of this thread.

Good grief, when did I say that?! Don't put words in my mouth.
Also, wow, that other Lucifer by Erlking was impressive, though it could use a few more paragraph breaks. That's really my only criticism of it. It's really good.

[sherlock1110]

I remember seeing a pretty good Lucifer sheet back on the old thread. One of his NPs was calling on meteors of light to rain from the sky representing the rebel angels who fell from heaven, I think.

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Oh, here it was.

The first time I read this one I was being stupid, no change there, and read it like it would be a sheet for Satan. It was a very good sheet for Lucifer but I feel like for some of Angels and other Divine Creatures classifying them by weapon would be difficult. And as Lucifer he can't really be a Beast class Servant so either you make some kind of good reason (like this sheet did) or you invent an entirely new class to fit them into (want to leave the opportunity for genderbend Lucifer open).

[Skull]

Caster

"Say Master, can we just forget about fightin' Servants and play those 'Video Games' instead?"

True Name: "Der Zauberlehrling" (The Sorcerer's Apprentice)
Origin: Mythological
Region: Germany
Catalyst: A broom that was split in half by an axe
Alignment: Chaotic Good
Likes: Pranks, Slacking Off
Dislikes: Chores, Hard Work
Talents: Academics
Natural Enemy: Adults

Personality:
A cheeky young man who dreams of becoming a great Sorcerer just like his master. Caster has a lot of potential in Magecraft but lacks the discipline to study for long periods of time and would rather goof around and play pranks on people with his magic. Enamoured with the wonders of the modern day, his wish upon the Grail would be to be incarnated into the modern age so he can have some more fun. He is rather inexperienced when it comes to actual combat and is better suited to a support type role to a strong Master. However, he shouldn't be underestimated as despite his youth and attitude, his magical ability far outranks modern Magi and he could easily defeat an enemy Master in a one on one duel.

Parameters:
STR (D), END (C), AGI (C), MGI (A), LCK (C), NP (B)

Class Skills:
Item Creation (B)
The Skill to manufacture magical items, from implements of war to items for daily use. Also, this Skill requires time to gather components and manufacture items. Caster can create and enchant tools to aid his Master in combat.

Territory Creation (C)
The Skill to build a special terrain that is advantageous to oneself as a magus, such as for the purpose of collecting mana. Caster can modify an area into a shoddy replica of his master's Workshop. Staying in there gives his MGI stat a plus modifier.

Personal Skills:
Familiar Creation (C)
A Skill that allows the user to create a familiar and control it from a distance. Caster is able to create large numbers of small animals that are virtually indistinguishable from the real thing and have them act as his familiars. However, Caster's familiars are rather weak and ill suited for combat so he mainly just uses them for reconnaissance.

High-Speed Incantation (B)
The ability to speak magical incantations at an accelerated speed, thus reducing casting time. Caster should be capable of having this Skill at Rank A...if only he could learn to stop biting his tongue when trying to speak faster.

Mana Burst (C)
The increase in performance caused by infusing one's weapons and body with Magical Energy and instantly expelling it. Simply put, recreating the effect of a jet burst by expending large amounts of Magical Energy. This is a last ditch strategy for Caster to defend himself against enemies with the Magic Resistance Skill. Pouring his mana into his muscles, Caster gets a temporary Rank Up in his physical Parameters. Sadly this does not improve Caster's fighting ability and so all that happens is a slightly stronger kid flails his arms at an opponent.

Noble Phantasm:

Friends on the Other Side

Die Geister, die ich rief

[B] - Anti Unit

Using his magical power, Caster calls forth one of the four Elementals (Great Spirits of Nature) to do his bidding, though only one at a time (but a Command Seal can briefly make multiple be summoned). Powerful beings of magical energy, they can fight Servants and even the Knight Classes with their Magic Resistance should be wary of them. The main threat is that you essentially have two Servants while this Noble Phantasm is active, not to mention potential buffs from one's Master. While the Elementals can think and fight alone, all of their power comes from Caster and so if he is incapacitated or they go outside of range then they disappear. Also, Caster only gets one set per Grail War and so if they die then they are gone. If Caster receives power through all three of his Master's Command Seals then the ultimate attack is unleashed, "Terra Force" [A+] in which all four Elementals combine their powers into a huge ball of energy and throw it to destroy the surrounding landscape. An Anti-Army attack of immense destruction, only to be used as an absolute last resort.

The Elementals' details are as follows:

Nymph of Water - A beautiful mermaid that would rather flirt with hot guys than fight. Fickle and whiny, Caster wouldn't use her if she weren't so useful. At her best when close to large bodies of water and her defensive magic is nigh-impregnable. One hundred metres range.

Sylph of Air - A goggle wearing pint-sized fairy with attitude. Eager to get into fights and has easily the most range at close to a mile, though is the weakest offensively. His sonic speed and wide reaching wind magic is not to be underestimated.

Pygmy of Earth - An oversized mole that would sleep all the time until Caster pesters it to battle. His strength rivals a Berserker and can bend steel like it were paper. Incredibly slow and only 10 metres range, be suited for a close combat melee.

Salamander of Fire - A humanoid Dragon, the strongest and the leader of the four. His raging temper is to be feared and even Caster won't call him unless absolutely necessary. He is the most well-rounded in all stats and has 500 metre range, Salamander can even be expected to go toe to toe with Saber. His fire is said to be so hot it burns for seven days without being extinguished.

Lore:

"Der Zauberlehrling" is a poem written by Goethe based on a fairytale he heard when he was young. The tale was an old one that was said to date as far back as the Ancient Greeks. It spoke of an old sorcerer departing his workshop, leaving his apprentice with chores to perform. Tired of fetching water by pail, the apprentice enchants a broom to do the work for him – using magic in which he is not yet fully trained. The floor is soon awash with water, and the apprentice realizes that he cannot stop the broom because he does not know how. The apprentice splits the broom in two with an axe – but each of the pieces becomes a whole new broom that takes up a pail and continues fetching water, now at twice the speed. When all seems lost, the old sorcerer returns and quickly breaks the spell. The poem finishes with the old sorcerer's statement that powerful spirits should only be called by the master himself.

***

A quick sheet I wrote up while bored one evening. Huh, I made it all the way through without making a Fantasia joke. And yet I made a "Princess and the Frog" reference instead, funny that. Anyway, I tried to breath as much life into a short poem as I could. I figured I'd make this since I haven't made a single Caster that actually uses magic so I fixed that. As usual, all comments and criticisms are welcome.

[Draconic]

I like it.

[sherlock1110]

The Sorcerer's Apprentice: One day, Merlin and Iskander had a baby... This was quite the funny sheet to read, it was on the whole quite well written and would make for an interesting Servant in a Grail War. I can't help but wonder what would happen to him if somehow the incompetence holding him back was removed, still trying to work out if him and Waver would get along. Now onto the criticisms, I'd like to know even a brief description of what kind of familiars he can summon, I know this must be very obnoxious of me sorry. The Noble Phantasm is, somewhat disappointingly, quite short. Each summon could have been fleshed out and it feels quite anticlimactic, ultimately he would be limited to a support role.

[RoydGolden]

I've always felt a great deal of sympathy for Lucifer. I have part of the sheet finished already, so I'll post his history and one Noble Phantasm for now, just because venomking's was so bad.

That Lucifer sheet looks pretty promising, WIP or no. It helps that I'm a sucker for those 'sympathy for the devil' tragic villains...

That Noble Phantasm is pure grade-A nightmare fuel though. Just soul-stealing is bad enough, but invoking the threat of eternal hellfire is something else altogether. Still, it definitely fits his legend so I'm not complaining. I don't think the concept of "Hell" or a traditional afterlife really works in the Nasuverse seeing as it operates off of a reincarnation-based metaphysic (unless you're saying "Hell" is actually his or God's personal Reality Marble, I guess), but I suppose that's a necessary bit of artistic license for the concept of a God/Devil based Servant to work at all.

Flavor aside though, that NP is really hax. If there's no defense or resistance at all (not even a listed range) then it sounds like just invoking it is an instant-win condition for him. I get that it's effectively limited by how reluctant he is to use it, but still, this is way too powerful to be balanced in any kind of Holy Grail War. I'd strongly advise adding some limitations to it, such as having it only work on those of an "Evil" Alignment (even if in name only like Drake or Atalanta, to preserve the element of moral ambiguity), make evasion possible with a Luck check or warding it off through religious-protection based Skills such as Saint or Protection Of The Faith. Anything to make it slightly less OP...

The choice of Skills is also quite unusual and not at all what I'd imagine for a Lucifer sheet (Bravery and Guardian Knight?), but I presume they're more closely tied to his self before the fall from Heaven?

[the god of world-0]

This time using a face claim, my original idea from his aparence was much more dark, but When i see this character, i had to use them
Caster:Helel ben shahar
Fc:
Str:B, End:B, Agi:A
Mna:A, lck:EX, Np:A
Aligment: chaotic/neutral
Gender:none (refered to as he)
Height: 175cm
Weight: 54kg
Place of origin: garden of eden
Armament: none(hidden dagger)
Likes: good discusions, his plans going wright, interesting people
Deslike: prideful humans, his plans going wrong, gods and demi-gods
Talents: planing, lying, writing
Natural enemies: any deity

Skills:
terrioty creation(A+): the creation of a (garden) who is superior to a temple is possible

item construction(A): capable of creating magical itens and potions of high quality, a natural ability of caster who has been around for so much time

charisma(EX): people will follow caster even against their masters, it will affect even familiars and other beings without free will

Magic resistence(A):the ability to cancel spells of A-rank, a remaining of caster's lost divinity

deceiving deity(EX):a skill of beings famous for their tricks, it can grant presence concealment(A), shapeshift(B) and alluring voice(B) but only one at time.

miracle(false)(A+): the ability to fake the impossible. despite the high level, its only effect is granting caster his first and third noble phantasm.

Noble phantasms:
Gan eden: the garden of god(anti-evil: A):
The garden of eden, a reality marble that brings forth the image of a paradise.
Granted to caster by his "miracle(false)" skill, inside the garden nobody can do damage exept those with divinity rank A or higher, Noble phantasm born from evil intentions are also sealed.

Nahash: then your eyes shall open and you shall be as god(anti-innocence:A):
The nature of caster as the serpent of eden in the form of a daggers. both snakes and daggers are symbols of betrayal, so its form is nothing weird.
It can only be used inside "Gan eden" and is incapable of doing damage, However anyone hit by its blade will be cleanse of any type of divinity or divine protection and marked with the "original sin"

Esh umain: he who does acts of creation(anti-sin: A):
The divine punishment of god in the form of lightning. Its only a copy of said power, so its rank has been lowered to A.
Its a simple noble phantasm, upon its name is relesed, dark clouds will take the skys, a strong wind will start to blow and finaly, a pilar of white lightning will strike anyone with the "mark of the first sin", but only those people and anyone else.

Lore:
Caster is Helel ben sharar, more popular know as Lucifer or the devil. He was the most beatyful and powerful of angels and the right hand of god, there are also theories that he is releated to the vênusian gods of diferent cultures.
He was banish from heaven for rebel against god when ordered to bowl to the first human, he gather a third of the angels on the firmament and raged war, but was easy defeted.
Personality:
Well and soft-spoken, he is someone who exile charm, but also gives a sense of danger. His distracted facade hides a cunning and analytical mind.
He used to disguise itself and strike deals with humans, but is trying to end this habit nowadays
He realy dont hate humanity that much, "only the fools who put thenselfs over the others". Ironically, while hating prideful man, he is very prideful himself

[the god of world-0]

Just read the sorcerer's aprendice sheet, it was nostalgic and creative, but something releated to music whould be cool

[RoydGolden]

Wow, looks like everybody is doing Lucifer sheets all of a sudden. Still looking forward to Draconic's take though...

As for World-0's sheet... the NPs are actually pretty well-done and creative, especially how they work together. Though I wouldn't make his Charisma bypass free-will as the whole point of the Devil (of which this take on Lucifer is obviously based) is that while he can tempt people, he can't force them to do anything apart from their own will.

[Skull]

The Sorcerer's Apprentice: One day, Merlin and Iskander had a baby... This was quite the funny sheet to read, it was on the whole quite well written and would make for an interesting Servant in a Grail War. I can't help but wonder what would happen to him if somehow the incompetence holding him back was removed, still trying to work out if him and Waver would get along. Now onto the criticisms, I'd like to know even a brief description of what kind of familiars he can summon, I know this must be very obnoxious of me sorry. The Noble Phantasm is, somewhat disappointingly, quite short. Each summon could have been fleshed out and it feels quite anticlimactic, ultimately he would be limited to a support role.

I went back and modified the sheet as suggested. At first the NP was kind of Stand like, but now poor Zauberlehrling is a full Pokémon master with a dash of DBZ to make it more exciting.

[the god of world-0]

I should have explain better, his charisma can affect people without free will, like familiars and such

[RoydGolden]

I went back and modified the sheet as suggested. At first the NP was kind of Stand like, but now poor Zauberlehrling is a full Pokémon master with a dash of DBZ to make it more exciting.

Have to say, with all the exotic conceptual stuff we see in Fate I actually quite like the "traditional magician" vibe you gave this guy. I could totally picture him as a mage in, say, Fairy Tail or some similar magic-shonen series... The whole deal with spirit summoning and their various personalities reminds me a bit of Lucy's Celestial Spirits actually, particularly how the water one is a (to put it bluntly) bratty bitch.

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I should have explain better, his charisma can affect people without free will, like familiars and such

Ah, that makes far more sense. You could probably clarify it a little more in the sheet itself, though...

[Skull]

Have to say, with all the exotic conceptual stuff we see in Fate I actually quite like the "traditional magician" vibe you gave this guy. I could totally picture him as a mage in, say, Fairy Tail or some similar magic-shonen series...

Thank you. Final Fantasy was a big inspiration from the Face Claim to the monster summoning.

[the god of world-0]

Skull is a talented person

[the god of world-0]

I want to make a list of my sheets to put on my signature, but i dont understand how, can someone explain?

[RoydGolden]

I want to make a list of my sheets to put on my signature, but i dont understand how, can someone explain?

Just highlight the sheet(s) you want, click "copy shortcut", paste it in your signature, then write out the URL tags and you should be set. Which part are you having trouble with?

[the god of world-0]

Actuly my idea was closer to yours compendium, is this how you did?